Great new crime show? Corset is
SECRETS Of The Driving
Test on ITV on Thursday was a hilarious fly-on-the-dashboard peek into why more than 50 per cent of people fail.
Alan Carr narrates the funny series packed with dodgy driving, white-knuckle rides and gritted teeth.
The best bit was when 27-year-old Shaunna, left, flirted outrageously with examiner Wayne. As she told him he had “massively blue eyes” he looked like he wanted to action man dive out of the car into traffic.
Shaunna, who has tried uniforms, acting older and short skirts in a bid to pass, failed her 12th test in a decade. But she wins on creativity.
With plenty of gasps, near-misses and high anxiety, this series didn’t stall on entertainment.
WE’VE seen enough troubled detectives in our time to know their suffering.
But have a heart for the detective women of Victorian times who had to do their crime-busting in a rib-crushing corset and bothersome bonnet. Yeah, Sherlock, put that in your pipe.
This is why Eliza Scarlet, played by Peaky Blinders actress Kate Phillips, is my new favourite private investigator, a refreshing break from the norm. A kickass Jessica Fletcher in bloomers and a bustle.
Tongue-in-cheek, funny and pacy, Miss Scarlet and the Duke arrived on Alibi on Tuesday – a period crime drama about London’s first female private detective.
No, before you ask, it’s not based on a true story. It feels more like it’s based on a plot from Cluedo.
Arriving home, Eliza was given some terrible news by the maid about her detective dad. It was a case of Mr Scarlet in the drawing room with the cardiac arrest. Bit awkward because her dad has left her penniless and the only ladylike thing to do is to acquire a suitable husband.
But an earlier scene of Eliza having a bitch-fight with a drunken wench, then pocketing her glass eye, suggests this might not be on the cards.
Glint
Also, she’d rather poke her own eyeballs out with a fork than host afternoon tea for well-to-do ladies.
Instead of accepting one of her many, many marriage proposals, she will just operate her dad’s detective agency. After all, he taught her everything he knows.
But getting someone to trust her with a case might be harder than she thinks.
“You can’t go out alone, what would people think?!” gasps the maid.
It looks like clever Eliza will still need a male partner in this man’s world. Hang on, didn’t we already meet her family friend, the dashing Detective Inspector William Wellington of Scotland Yard, aka the Duke?
That gorgeous man grooming his hipster beard who argues with her over every case he’s working on?
Yes of course, it’s all building towards Eliza and the Duke, played by Stuart Martin, teaming up.
OK there were some ridiculous moments, not least the unscrupulous client who was disguised in the worst fake beard of all time, but the drama wasn’t any less enjoyable.
I didn’t even mind that Eliza’s dad, played by Downton’s Kevin Doyle, popped up every five minutes either in flashback or as a wise, approving ghost.
Or that the “not becoming of a lady” point was hammered home in every scene.
A feminist heroine with a mischievous glint in her eye, I’m taking this ballbusting detective extremely seriously.
FOR a daily daytime dose
need to of misery you don’t
you could try watch the news,
instead. London Kills on BBC1
and Hugo Starring Sharon Small
cops, with some Speer as troubled
in the capital, grisly murder cases
little gem in this is a gripping
Just make the TV schedules.
kids sure you keep the out of the room for
this one.