Dogs of War? This Everton mob aren’t even puppies. Forget about digging out a performance... they couldn’t dig up a bone
JOE ROYLE strolled into a crisis at Everton – and solved it using his ‘Dogs of War’.
The Toffees were bottom of the pile when their old centre-forward breezed into Goodison Park back in 1994 and instilled a fighting spirit that saw them end the season lifting the FA Cup.
They scrapped, fought and weren’t afraid to bare their teeth when the going was tough.
Frank Lampard has walked into a similar situation – and what has he inherited?
A group that don’t even qualify for the term ‘Puppies of War’ – I mean, forget digging out performances, this lot couldn’t dig up a bone.
Matters off the pitch may be difficult because of the ownership situation at Goodison Park and what’s going on in the world today - but the players can’t control that. However, they can affect what goes on out on the green stuff. To coin a phrase: They need to man-up, fast, starting today at the London Stadium.
No more excuses. The time for action, for actually doing something about it is now.
Grafters
Back in the day, I played against that Dogs of War side for both Nottingham Forest and Liverpool.
They were grafters.
The likes of Dave Watson, David Unsworth, Barry Horne, Graham Stuart - they all knew what it was about. It wasn’t pretty. But they stuck together and gave Everton a fighting chance.
I just can’t see it with this lot. Look at the current crop. Let’s just take the midfield and let me tell you what I think. Then judge for yourselves whether I am miles off the mark...
DELE ALLI – lightweight, but a nice boy.
DONNY VAN DE BEEK – not cut out for a scrap. He must be saying to himself: ‘What am I doing here?’
TOM DAVIES – spends more time messing around with Dominic Calvertlewin as a clothes-horse than he does playing football.
ANDRE GOMES – came back after a nasty injury and hasn’t been the same.
ANWAR EL GHAZI – the loanee is not good enough for Everton. I’d have driven him from Merseyside back to Villa Park.
ALLAN – (right) very good technically, but way short of the quality any of the top-four sides would want.
ANDROS TOWNSEND – he has given it a go, but he’s too old.
FABIAN DELPH – another player who is too old and he’s always carrying an injury.
ABDOULAYE DOUCOURE
– average.
Look at them all. Let’s be honest, if I was a Premier League midfielder, I wouldn’t be losing sleep at facing any of them.
So, Everton’s players need to find it from somewhere within themselves to discover their mojo. And it’s no good looking to the manager, or blaming external issues. The answers have to come from within.
During the 1993-94 season, I went through the same at Forest. The players booked a boozer and thrashed it out among themselves – with management present.
We decided the bleeding had to stop – and ended up promoted after a slow start to the season.
In the future, Everton owner Farhad
Moshiri, if he remains in charge, needs to put someone in who can bang a few heads together and conduct a root and branch investigation of the place. Have a lot of the people who have been part of the fixtures and fittings over-stayed their welcome?
Fall
Bill Kenwright has always been kind to me and I don’t like writing this, but he has been involved in this spectacular fall from grace during the past six years. First-team coach Duncan Ferguson and Under-23s chief Unsworth – good Evertonians both – are they fit for purpose? I hope so.
Perhaps those are questions for when this has all died down. But you need a reaction from inside the dressing room and that time is upon everyone at Goodison Park.
It’s pointless looking at Lampard. He can’t inject talent into them. But a change of attitude can be overseen, and generated, by the players themselves.
So, it IS meant to be a slur, this ‘puppies of war’ tag. And if those first-team stars want to throw it back in my face at the end of all this, I’ll be happy to take it.
Everton are in crisis.
And in the week where the Oscars hit the headlines, a sequel – the Dogs of War II – needs to be played out in front of a disbelieving audience.