IN THE KNOW WITH
NOW that LOVE ISLAND has shuddered to a climax, TV bosses are casting about for the next new sexy reality show to delight the soft- of- mind.
And it looks like ex OILED HOLE frontman- turnedimagineering executive DONG PROBERT has a winner.
Dong’s come up with a concept called SEX CELLAR – where six female contestants vie to escape the basement by performing “certain acts”. One telly boss said: “It sounds sick. Great!” WHO will complete the STIFF MALARKEY lineup now that pretty JULIE HOPPER has left the controversial girl group for the bright lights of Hollywood? My spies tell me that one name the frame in is former PINK AVENUE star KELLY OBOE, who left the show after a disagreement over a filming schedule in Davenham. Malarkey manager STUART DINGLE is believed to have been “convinced” by Kelly’s credentials while on a caravanning holiday with the pertlet in Buxton. THE long- awaited split of pop- toppers SMOOTH BONNET has come to pass, after seven months of rumblings that all was not well in the group.
Lively LYDIA GASHE has walked out and sullen JANIE HIMEN said she’s taking a “creative break”. That only leaves keyboardist and accordion player HETTIE CALGRILL.
A source close to the band said: “There’s no way that Hettie can go solo after what happened in Stoke.” Too true. YOU would have thought that with BIG BROTHER drawing audiences smaller than a medium-sized car crash, the format was dead in the water – like that badger at JOOP KELP’S pool party last year. But it seems not. I’m told BOING! TV are planning another social 15 experiment-style show involving inmates trapped in a disused prison camp near Dove Holes. A Boing! source told me: “It’s a bit like Big Brother, yes, but it’s the only thing we could think of. The other option was a rip-off of NOEL’S HOUSE PARTY. And that won’t happen.” I’M told by my spies in Kettering that Northamptonshire’s top night spot, GROOMERS, had a bit of trouble last Saturday night – in the shape of WUMBLES drummer NASH PERRY. Nash, famously dumped by LOLITA’S PANTIES star JENNIE WINSTANLEY after she caught him with an alpaca, apparently arrived in his uncle’s tractor – complete with muckspreader. A club spokesman said: “We have rules. No drugs, trainers – and no farmyard machinery.”