NAKED PUMPKIN CARVER CHOPS OFF OWN WILLY
NATURISTS go to great lengths to prove they are normal people who live normal lives, albeit without clothes.
But there are maybe some activities which do not sit well with the unclad life – like carving Halloween pumpkins.
That nugget of common sense was lost on Jarvis Harrison who, assisted by his life- partner Ellie Forth, hosted a presentation on the art of pumpkin carving at a meeting of the Lowestoft and District Fresh Air Appreciation Society.
Slipped
And, as any sane person may have predicted, the wielding of sharp knives at waist level led to disaster – when the blade slipped and Jarvis, 26, sliced his COCK off!
In the ensuing blood- soaked pandemonium, 22- year- old Ellie passed out and struck her head on the side of the presentation bench and two elderly members suffered seizures.
The whole sorry saga was caught for posterity by a member with a video camera – who was streaming the event for a special online nudist TV channel.
Ambulances were dispatched to Lowestoft’s Moseley Memorial Hall in order to carry off the casualties.
Last night Jarvis was still under sedation after undergoing a three- hour operation to reattach his member.
Ellie said: “I spent the night in hospital under observation but they let me out. Poor Jarvis. He had been looking forward to his demo so much.
“I tried to warn him that it might be dangerous but he would not hear of it. He said as long as he stayed on flop, he’d be OK. I don’t think he was on bonk when it happened. It’s so sad. I hope it still works after the op.
“He’s not particularly big down there but he’s a trier, and that counts for a lot.”