Sunday Sport

CRAZED CORBYN LOOKALIKE CHOPS OFF HIS OWN COCK!

SUNDAY SPORT EXCLUSIVE

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A JEREMY Corbyn lookalike was so upset about the never- ending transgende­r debate that he hacked off his own WILLY.

Far left Labour fanatic Bob Peterson, 69, said the “split second” self- mutilating act was born out of frustratio­n with the increasing­ly loud arguments against trans rights.

The retired welder, from Lincoln, used one of his wife’s kitchen knives to sever his cock – leaving him in agony and soaked in blood.

Worse, the grandad instantly REGRETTED his symbolic gesture.

He said: “This whole trans thing was getting to me. If a fella wants to call himself a lass and get his cock out in the ladies’ loos, what’s what wrong with that?

“It’s 2018, for Christ’s sake. There’s no harm in having a penis, even in the ladies. You’d think they’d be far too busy talking about boys and make- up to worry about the odd hairy chubb.

“I was so angry at some people’s closed minds that I needed to let my frustratio­n out, and in a moment of madness, I chopped my dick off.

“I’m forever being told I look a lot like Jeremy Corbyn, which is a massive compliment as he is my political hero.

“I’d hoped my likeness to him would propel my story into the headlines and lead to lasting change – for the many, not the few.

“First I took a pic of myself with the knife in my mouth and posted it on Twitter and a transgende­r forum, to raise awareness.

“Then I went to the shed, dropped my pants, grabbed my knob and cut through it with the knife.

“It was surprising­ly easy. It turns out that penis flesh is very soft.

“But seconds later the blood – and the screaming agony – began. The sight of the wound spurting was too much to take in and I dropped my cock on the floor.

“It was then I knew I’d made a mistake, and called an ambulance. Then I passed out.

“Instead of making a massive political point, it led to paramedics squashing my member into a box of Mr Freeze lollies from my freezer.

“They’ve reattached it but it’ll be months before I know if my todger will be able to do the business again.”

He added: “This is what happens when you drink cider in the sun. They should ban it.” IDOL: Bob and Jezza

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