NO-DEAL BREXIT BLOCKADE BOOST FOR VICE GIRLS
Queues of lorries will be like ‘gold dust’ for hookers
FORECASTS of miles- long queues of lorries heading towards British ports in the event of a no- deal Brexit may be bad news for commerce.
But it’s GOOD news for the country’s hookers – who say holdups will be gold dust for them.
Last weekend it emerged that the government is planning to put thousands of portable toilets along the M20 in Kent, in case a no- deal Brexit causes massive delays at ports.
Contingency planners are preparing for a 13- mile- long ‘ Brexit stack’ on the coastbound carriageway of the motorway.
To allow the drivers to relieve themselves discreetly and hygienically, portable loos would be deployed at intervals along the motorway.
Satisfied
But a tinkle and a plop won’t be the only needs that Yorkie- munching truckers will be able to have satisfied by the roadside.
One hooker told Sunday Sport: “I know it doesn’t sound very patriotic but huge queues of lorry drivers will great news for us working girls.
“The truck lads will need to pass their time somehow – and what better than sex?
“These queues, if they happen, will be gold dust to us.”
A no- deal could likely result in tailbacks stretching up to 13 miles to Dover.
Preparations for the M20 queues are just one of a raft of measures that Theresa May’s Cabinet is devising in the event of “no deal” – which will effectively see Britain blockaded by the EU.
Stockpile
Trade in and out of our ports will be severely restricted to emergency humanitarian supplies and the blockade will be enforced by the navies of France, Germany, Spain and Holland.
In July it was revealed Ministers in Britain had drawn up secret plans to stockpile processed food, in the event of EU divorce talks collapsing – to show Brussels that a “no deal” is not a bluff.