No, it’s w**king lotion …not THAT kind of palm oil
BARRY’S SHOP BURNED DOWN BY PRO-ORANGUTAN ACTIVISTS Alison looks swell!
BUXOM Alison Hassell needed just a little persuading to get her top off for
The 19- year- old, from Congleton, Cheshire, confessed: “My boyfriend Billy said I should send a photo in, but I’m not sure my boobs are really big enough for
“I’d love to know what readers think though – if they like my pic, I might go fully nude in a top shelf magazine.”
Would you like to see your sexy pic in
Simply back. FIREBOMBED: Green folk targeted shop and ( Barry email – and we’ll reply straight IF you don’t want your store burned down by eco- thugs, DON’T tell folk you sell PALM OIL!
That’s the lesson learned by shopkeeper Barry Harris.
Barry thought he was onto a winner when he got a job lot of a branded masturbation lubricant called Happy Chappie Palm Oil at a knockdown price.
As Barnsley’s biggest retailer of top- shelf magazines, Barry thought that his punters would snap up the soothing lotion – “guaranteed to protect the palm from friction scorching”.
But the 57- year- old trader hadn’t realised the words “palm oil” are highly politicised right now.
“Palm oil” is more commonly known as a widely- used ingredient in household goods and foodstuffs and whose cultivation kills off orangutans in their natural habitat.
And it’s believed to be supporters of the wise ginger monkeys BANNED: Iceland ad
SUNDAY SPORT EXCLUSIVE
who firebombed Barry’s South Yorkshire shop.
He raged: “If these green folk were not so drug- addled, they would know I was selling oil to protect the palms of your hand, not oil made from palm trees.
“I’ve checked all the ingredients and there are no palm trees in this oil. It’s just sustainable Albanian sump oil.
“Meanwhile, these animal rights hooligans should reflect on the fact that their fire killed two dozen puppies I had in the store room, ready for the Christmas rush.”
Public opinion has recently turned against palm oil when an Iceland monkey advert about the controversial topic was banned.