DOWNING STREET CAT IS RUSSIAN SPY
4am WORLD EXCLUSIVE
TOP security officials have identified the mole at the heart of government behind a string of embarrassing leaks… LARRY the Downing Street CAT!
And in a development that will send a shudder through the British Establishment, it appears that the brown and white tabby is being controlled by the RUSSIANS!
MI5 spy- hunters swung into action last week when confidential memos from Britain’s Ambassador to Washington, Sir Kim Darroch, were leaked.
The memos described the Trump administration as “clumsy” and “diplomatically inept” and sparked a flurry of furious tweets from the famously thin- skinned U. S. President.
The ensuing storm led to Sir Kim’s resignation and has kyboshed moves for a post- Brexit free trade deal between the USA and Britain.
Pro- Remain officials were initially blamed for the leak but it’s believed that MI5 boffins found a tiny transmitter imbedded in Larry’s ARSE!
A well- placed Number 10 source said: “It was clear that the leak had come from the highest level and Larry – being chief Downing Street mouser – has access to all areas in Number 10.
“A microphone hidden in his feline nipsy would have picked up every word of highly- secret conversations in Number 10.
“Then it would have been a matter of simple electronics to relay that audio to the Russian Embassy in Kensington Palace Gardens.
“God know what other information has been picked up. Larry could be the dangerous Russian mole since the Cold War.”
Crude
It’s feared that a Russian agent of President Vladimir Putin tempted Larry with some fish while he was patrolling his territory in central London and used a special spy probe to insert the transmitter into his backside.
Our source said: “It’s a crude way of spying but clearly very effective.”
It’s thought that Larry’s spy probe could be behind other Number 10 leaks – including that from the National Security Council regarding concerns over Chinese firm Huawei building Britain’s 5G mobile network.
Former Defence Secretary Gavin Williamson took the rap for that one – now it seems he might have been innocent after all.
Our Downing Street insider said: “There’s nothing else for it. Theresa May will have to take Larry into the Number 10 garden and twat the treasonous little f** ker with a shovel.”