The latest trans nonsense is a load of bollocks

IF I walked into the beauty salon just a few steps from Sunday Sport Towers, pointed at the prettiest beautician and announced I would very much like her to shave my ballbag, there’s a very good chance that:

a) A police constable would be summoned.

b) My teeth would be kicked halfway down my throat by community- minded onlookers, and rightly so. But… If I slapped on a bit of lippy, dusted my stubble with powder and tottered into the shops wearing my old mum’s Dr Scholl’s sandals while calling myself Doreen, it would be a different matter.

First of all, failure to shave my bollocks would be “transphobia”. Refusal to hold up my winkle while razoring the fuzz beneath would be a hate crime. Think I’m taking the piss? Look at a case that’s blown up in Canada. A transgender woman ( sorry, we have to do it without inverted commas these days) has filed a human rights complaint over claims waxers refused to do treatment on her testicles.

Madness

See! See what I f** king mean. This madness means I have to write the words “… on HER testicles”.

Jessica Yaniv ( above) says she has been refused Brazilian waxing services at more than a dozen beauty salons since 2018.

The 32- year- old filed an official complaint alleging she had been refused waxing because she is transgender.

But Yaniv has not yet had sex reassignment surgery, which means she still has meat and veg.

Her story has made headlines across Canada where it has been dubbed the “Scrotum Waxing” case. Jesus, has it come to this? Hundreds of years of hard- won human rights come down to the “Scrotum Waxing” case.

Has Yaniv considered the fact that a beautician may be equally or more upset at being told the law insists they handle some fat f** ker’s cock and balls?

But that won’t even occur to the more militant members of the trans church.

For them, if a 25- stone hairyarsed truck driver called Dave says he’s a woman – that’s that. Even if Dave has three days of stubble and four days of skids in his Y- fronts.

Everyone has the absolute right to live as they like and identify as any gender they choose.

There’s a word for the bizarre cases at the frontier of the gender war – and it’s very appropriate…

BOLLOCKS!