I don’t pay my taxes for them to line shit gangs’ pockets!

FURY AS ALBANIAN PLOP MOBSTERS CASH IN ON STAFF FURLOUGH SCHEME

IF you thought squillionaire Victoria Beckham using the Government’s job retention scheme to furlough workers was bad, it gets worse…

Because a Sunday Sport probe has discovered that ALBANIAN SHIT GANGS are helping themselves to taxpayers’ from the scheme, too.

The programme, announced by Chancellor Rishi Sunak at the start of the crisis, pays 80 per cent of the wages for workers laid off due to the collapse of economic activity during lockdown.

The aim is to prevent a surge in jobless figures, but the scheme has proved controversial.

Former Spice Girl Victoria Beckham attracted a storm of criticism when she used the scheme to furlough 25 of her staff – despite her family being worth a reported £ 335million.

But that pales into insignificance alongside the idea of criminal gangs getting their hands of public funds to pay idle footsoldiers.

Shit gang kingpin Arian Cela boasted: “My boys, they sit about. There is no shit to steal.

“I am businessman. I make no money with no shit. Your Government give me money to pay my boys. I no stupid. I take!”

The shit gang racket works by gang members sneaking into public toilets to steal stools from lavatory pans.

The end use of the shit is unknown but according to police sources is “likely to be desperately unpleasant.”

But since lockdown, public toilet use has fallen and some loos have been mothballed by cost- cutting councils.

The plight of the shit gangs cuts little ice with taxpayers’ groups.

Terry Furey of the Fair Tax Alliance Campaign raged: “I do not pay my taxes for that money to line the filthy pockets of shit gang members.

“I’m sorry, I’m too angry to speak.”

LOOS END: Arian Cela is happy to take money from UK taxpayers now toilets are closed