TRUMP ‘CURES’ COVID WITH HIS BUM BUTTER
Trump’s latest quack virus cure is nut-spread ENEMAS
POTTY President Trump has a new way to keep free of coronavirus – daily injections of PEANUT BUTTER up his arse!
And First Lady Melania is NOT happy!
The 73- year- old Commander- in- Chief read about the unconventional remedy on a conspiracy website last week and ordered the presidential physician, Dr Sean Conley, to administer the quack cure.
The former US Navy medic refused, citing ethical reasons, so Trump ordered a female Secret service agent to do the honours instead.
The first session was a less than 100% success as the President clenched his rectum when the buttery spread shot up his backpipe, spurting peanut butter over the agent and on an 18th century bedspread in the presidential quarters.
A White House source said: “The First Lady heard the President yelping and cursing, ran in and saw the scene.
“Well, it looked like something from a German scat movie and Trumpy had a real devil of a job persuading his wife it was only peanut butter – and a ‘ 100% effective’ way to ward off corona. “She was furious. “The agent asked to be reassigned, so now a nurse from Trump’s medical detail is having
to give him nut- spread enemas.
“Just another chapter in the lunatic Trump White House story. You literally could not make this up.”
Last week the Yank President told the press he is taking the malaria medication hydroxychloroquine to ward off coronavirus, despite public health officials warning it may be unsafe, and regulators warning the drug may cause heart problems.