Jogger runs into a human head!
A RUNNER found a human head on the side of a road while out for a morning jog.
The woman called cops after her horrifying discovery around 7am.
The head was found in a grassy patch between the pavement and the edge of a road in St Petersburg, Florida.
“A lot of people might have thought it was just an animal, but she perceived it really did look like a human,” police department spokeswoman Yolanda Fernandez said.
Homicide detectives searched the area for more remains or possible clues, while the head was turned over to the
Medical Examiner’s office.
The jogger reportedly told police she didn’t believe the head was there when she was on a run the previous day.
AFTER going four long months without a single stranger spunking on her tits, keen dogger Carole Parker was well and truly fed up.
So, she was excited to get back to her favourite sexual pastime when the lockdown was eased last weekend.
But the catering supervisor from Kettering was left very disappointed to find the new one- metre social distancing measures meant not one of the blokes knocking one out over her in a woodland car park managed to get a drop of jizz on her knockers.
The 37- year- old, who along with hubby Gavin has been dogging for nine years, said: “I’ve been desperate to get some dogging action in for ages.
“Not being able to regularly feel a rain of hot spunk splashing on to my face and breasts has really left me feeling out of sorts.
“I thought that with the pubs opening and that, Gav and I would get back to dogging as usual.
“So, we headed out to the woods and he took me doggy style over the bonnet of our Ford Ka while six men watched on and wanked their hard cocks.
“Gav was so excited he chucked his load up me in minutes, so I lay on the bonnet and splayed my legs then started fingering myself as the blokes all tossed off.
“Normally it ends in an almighty bukkake spunk shower but this time, because everyone was staying a metre away, not one single drip of jism reached me.
“It all fell on the ground… such a waste.”
Now Carole is searching high and low for a man whose spurting cock can fire a load MORE than three feet.
She said: “I want a super spunker! I need a man, or preferable men, whose jizz can fire more than a metre.
“I don’t want to risk getting the coronavirus but I still want to feel spunk dripping down my chest.”
In Alfred Kinsey’s famous study in 1950s America, he found: “In some males the semen may be propelled from a matter of some inches to a foot or two – or even as far as five or six and, rarely, eight feet”.