Mary hosts show on under- Beards

HISTORY brainbox Mary Beard is to present the biggest collection of BOOBS, MINGES and even WILLIES ever screened on British TV.

The Classics boffin ( above), 63, will present a two- part series entitled The Nude Uncovered on BBC2.

A BBC spokesman said: “Mary will be reflecting on the changing history of the way people have looked at and understood the naked human form.”

But the series will not just all nuddies. Insiders say Beard will also prattle on about “gender politics” and shit like that.

One said: “You’ll be getting to the vinegar stroke over some pert classical teats and Beard will pop up banging on about ‘ perceptions’. It’ll put you off your stroke.”