Estions on discipline and get sweet FA response!
FA a polite (honest) email, asking for clarity.
We received an automatic response claiming that they “strive to answer all guest questions with a personal response” and insisting, “your request is important to us and we promise to respond with a friendly and informative answer.”
Forty-three days on the answer is yet to arrive. I hate to say it, but I’m starting to think the FA might have reneged on their “promise” to us. Perhaps they’re busy. Worming the dog or something.
We wondered how busy, so more recently we sent a second email; this time adopting a deliberately sycophantic tone.
I burbled: “This is just to say how delighted I am with the renewed focus on the Respect campaign as it approaches its ten-year anniversary.
“It is excellent for youngsters and the game generally. The FA is to be applauded. ‘We only do positive’ is a great message. Keep up the good work. Can you forward my comments to the relevant persons please?” Lick, lick. Slurp, slurp.
They gave an answer to THAT load of old flimflam the same morning. It was as emetic as the “question”.
To wit: “It’s always great to receive positive messages such as yours.
“The opinions of those involved in the grassroots game are very highly valued so please be assured that the contents of your email will be shared with the relevant team.”
The gushing correspondence ended there. It had to. It was beginning to resemble something that Channel Five might show at Christmas.
The moral is this. If you want the FA to respond to a query you must do two things. First you should infuse your communications with enough boot kissing and treacle to make a pachyderm throw up.
More importantly, do not on any account make your question relevant, or, worse still, awkward.
Don’t you just love the FA.