We are not all obsessed with Manchester Utd

The current managerless Manchester United team is, by their own standards, mediocre at best. Why has this come about and what’s to be done?

We have considered the question and formulated the following response.

We couldn’t give a monkey’s.

There’s a misconception that everyone either loves or loathes United. Many supporters of other clubs are completely indifferent. Good luck to them in the Champions League.

But in the highly unlikely event of them either winning or being relegated from the Premier League, I wouldn’t care in the slightest.

Why would I? Our only issue was with the nasty little man they booted out yesterday.

Not that the national media realise that indifference towards United is more widespread than their dreary, interminable discussions about the club would suggest. An example of this came on the most recent edition of BBC 5Live’s Friday Football.

At one point, presenter Darren Fletcher, quite seriously asked listeners: “If you’re a Manchester United supporter – or a football supporter – what should that transfer strategy be at Manchester United to get them back competing on an even keel?”

In other words, if you’re “a football supporter” at all, you’re presumed to be as worried to bits about United as you are with your own club.

It turned out that this sort of faux-important debate was only the warm-up for the absurdly extensive coverage we endured yesterday.

We understand. United warrant more coverage than most.

But we draw the line at demanding that everyone be as obsessed with them as the media is.

You might be sick of Brexit talk too. But at least that’s important.