Weddings versus funerals ... I know which I enjoy more
Iattended a funeral this week. Those who need the details have them, so I shall just say it was a fine farewell to a wonderful bloke. There is little to recommend the mood during exequies in the church, cemetery or crematorium. But the wake afterwards is always enjoyable. This week’s especially so.
Immediately upon leaving a burial or cremation the attender’s mood can’t descend further. So the wake is always in my experience a peculiarly happy, as opposed to a joyous event.
I shall go further and say that, on average, the social side of a funeral is more enjoyable than that of a wedding. Why? For one thing, at a wake, we can say with certainty that the worst part of the day is definitely over.
Dressing for a funeral seems to be optional these days. But you can dress like the proverbial pox doctor’s clerk if you so wish. Weddings require uncomfortable overdressing for hours on end.
Once at the wake, there is no obligation to stay for long, or you can stay for hours. You can get blind drunk should you so wish and no one will disapprove, being as there is the perennial proviso “It’s what he would have wanted”.
Conversely, no one will mind if you don’t touch a drop.
Accepting a wedding invitation results in an entire Saturday being written off and drink may be all that gets you through it.
At a funeral reception, we reacquaint ourselves with old friends and vow to meet up more often (before inevitably failing to do so); and you only speak with those whose company you prefer.
At a wedding, you’re trapped. The first glimpse of the seating plan can be enough to sink your heart.
A good wake usually entails much hilarity.
There certainly was the other day. Nevertheless, there is also the entitlement to be as maudlin as we like, lest we forget that grief and mourning remain at the heart of the occasion.
Weddings also tend to feature Whitney Houston. So when I express a preference for funerals over weddings, I’m really not kidding. It’s a great paradox. I wish funerals weren’t necessary, but always enjoy them.