A great job for today’s teenagers

BY all accounts, Google is losing untold millions in revenue as advertisers withdraw, quite reasonably objecting to their products and services being promoted to the backdrop of a beheading or Islamist rant.

It is, apparently, rather easy for the tech-savvy, teenage terrorist to circumvent the automatic systems that Google has in place to detect such filth by embedding subliminal pictures of kittens.

Of course, once they cotton on to the reality that replacing kittens with topless ladies will move their videos into that other popular area of the internet, the porn section, then we are all lost.

Surely, the solution is obvious? Engage our own army of teenagers! There are millions of youngsters who selflessly give hundreds of hours of their time to beta-testing games from huge, IT conglomerates, sending in detailed fault reports yet, strangely, ignoring homework when clearly they would prefer to be out playing in the fields, enjoying the sunshine on their skin.

Their only reward is to receive a bug-ridden copy of a new game, months before the rest of the pale, acne-ridden youth community.

It’s easy to report a video on Youtube or a website via Google, so why doesn’t Google offer a Paypal bounty of, say, £50 to the first person who reports an “unsuitable” offering?

As a result, not only will we free our broadband connections from the scourge of medieval, streaming barbarism and radicalisation, but our own youth-army will be able to afford buckets of Clearasil from the proceeds, enhancing their prospects with members of the opposite sex and leading them out into the light.

As a parent of one of these creatures and hopeful that I may one day have the chance of grandchildren, I see little to dislike in this.

Hello? Are you listening Sergey Brin?

AIDAN RUFF, Alnwick