Dinosaur Corbyn is a Labour relic

FIRST they came for our TFL underwear ads. The bitingly cool hipsters of the capital shrugged. And voted Labour.

Then they came for our Ubers and there was a stirring, a muttering behind the sleek, oiled beards of the café klatch.

Petitions were digitally signed in their hundreds of thousands. Yet still, they vote Labour.

When they come for our taxefficient Starbucks, who will save us then? And will they still vote Labour?

Welcome to Saint Jeremy’s Britain viewed through the prism of his prophet, Mayor of London Sadiq Khan (pictured).

Cowed by the unions, lobbied and buffeted by single issue campaigners with vested

interests, we gain an insight into Labour’s economic policy and Luddite, protectionist attitudes.

Behind the times? These people are roaring, classwarrior dinosaurs and deserve political extinction.

On-trend, middle class, middle income, young, Labour voters, take note – they hate you and your lifestyles, your liberalism and your haircuts as much as they detest the Tories. Nice beards though.

When the coffee fountains run still and the lattes are lost, will the Uber-mensch of London once again bite their tongues and vote Labour or will finally taste sweet, Red blood and turn the streets Blue?

AIDAN RUFF, Alnwick