Dad opens up about depression that nearly killed him
TEACHER WHO SURVIVED SUICIDE ATTEMPT URGES OTHERS TO REACH OUT FOR HELP
SURROUNDED by his family and with his new baby daughter in his arms, Daniel Patten says he has a million reasons to be grateful.
The 31-year-old has a loving wife, supportive family and two children he adores.
But just 18 months ago, Daniel felt he had hit rock bottom and tried to end his own life by jumping from a bridge. The maths teacher at The Duchess’s High School, in Alnwick, couldn’t see any other option as his mind “spiralled out of control”.
Now recovering from the despair which nearly killed him, he hopes to use his experience to help others. Daniel said: “At the time I would think it was the best thing for everyone involved. I thought ‘I’m no good to anyone, I’m just making a mess of everything.’
“In the cold light of day I know I was a good person, but things were spiralling out of control and everything seemed a lot bigger, a lot worse, than it was.
“I was telling stories in my head about how bad everything was.
“Normal life was getting too much, just being a dad on very little sleep, having a job where there was pressure and not talking to anyone.”
Though Daniel said he was lucky to survive his suicide attempt, he described the aftermath as “awful”. He felt guilty and afraid of what the reaction would be from friends and students.
But after seeking treatment from his local mental health crisis team, and after a period at the St George’s Park mental health unit in Morpeth, he began to get better with the help of “amazing” wife Joanne. Going back to work was a daunting prospect. A teacher in a small community, he was worried he might be known as “the one who jumped off a bridge” – especially among his pupils.
But the dad-of-two said: “They’ve been really supportive and hopefully me saying that this happened to me and I’m a normal person will open up the conversation about the fact that it’s OK not to feel great, and that it’s important to get help and nip any problems in the bud.”
While he says he’s not “fixed”, Daniel cares for his mental health with exercise, staying away from alcohol and opening up about his problems when he needs to.
Last month, he finished the London Marathon, running in aid of Samaritans, a charity which supported him when he was at his most vulnerable. He set a target of £250 – but within weeks he collected £6,000, with his JustGiving page filled with messages of support from family, friends and pupils. Daniel said: “To anyone going through something similar, I would just say speak to people, just having a conversation with a Samaritan means they can talk it through with you. Each time I spoke to them I felt lighter. “When you say something out loud, you can look at it as though you were giving advice to a friend, and it’s much easier to see the positives, but to do that yourself when everything is just in your head, it’s much harder.” To donate, visit www.justgiving. com/fundraising/ daniel-patten.
People struggling with suicidal thoughts can telephone Samaritans on 116 123, or email jo@ samaritans. org