Where’s the magic wand?
RIGHT now harsh facts tell us Newcastle United are a club filled with the walking dead.
Mourners are at the ready, black armbands the order of the day.
United have now tasted victory only twice in 19 matches over three long, agonising months.
There are just 10 more games to go on a Grand National course of mighty obstacles for them to rescue a horrible season of growing embarrassment.
Steve Bruce makes great play of what he believes is ample time left and tells us he remains convinced of safety.
Yeah, 10 to go maybe but in almost twice as many games since mid-December his side has claimed victory on a mere two occasions so why is he so certain the trend is suddenly going to be reversed?
Maybe a magic wand has been found in the back cupboard because that run includes the times when Callum Wilson was in tandem with Miggy and the Saint.
Their collective return guarantees nought.
It merely produces some hope now Almiron as a No.10 is no longer being abused for his willingness to track back defending.
No, if survival is attained it is much more likely to be through the failures of others rather than the actions of themselves.
Newcastle have been suffering from a stiff neck looking over their shoulder for so long and the way to dramatically changes things is not to take tiny steps against average opposition.
Three successive draws is far from good enough given they came against Wolves, West Bromwich and Aston Villa without Jack Grealish.
They are wasted opportunities and if Newcastle do it again at Brighton next time out then what is waiting for them is frightening.
However much Bruce and other optimistic spouters try to talk up a dire situation, the truth cannot be hidden.
Certainly it is not lost on Geordies.
A 94th-minute equaliser against a distinctly average Villa at home is not a confidence-booster.
It is an encouragement to others, not us.
Burnley quickly took advantage with an away win and yesterday Brighton did the same. One point to us, three to rivals.
For God’s sake stop treating us like ignorant sops to be manipulated by words which suggest if we fail to see finery we know nothing.
This is not Hans Christian Anderson and ‘The Emperor’s New Clothes,’ a tale of an entire kingdom which ignored the bare facts for fear of judgement only to be called out by an innocent child who could see everything plain as day.
We know what is before us and we do not like it.
United’s only consistency is a failure to secure three points.
How many winnable matches are United going to squander?
During this current miserable run they have failed to beat Sheffield United, West Brom, Aston Villa twice, Fulham, Crystal Palace, Leeds twice, Wolves and Championship side Brentford.
Yet Bruce has told us nothing will change in Newcastle’s approach.
He said: “That is the way we have set up (tactically) and that is the way we are going to continue.”
Maybe the new system which coincided with the arrival of Graeme Jones suits Callum, Miggy and Saint-Maximin as a threesome but it is far from ideal for those currently in the stables.
Split strikers and a false No. 9 means Andy Carroll can forget it.
All he is going to get is either 30 seconds as against West Bromwich or two and a half minutes as against
Villa. Dwight Gayle can also give up all thoughts of playing as an orthodox central striker off the shoulder of the last defender. His only chance is wide, right or left.
Maybe however Bruce’s rigidness will produce a belated opportunity for Jacob Murphy who certainly deserves it.
Reduced to regular sub, he came on late second-half against Villa to strike the bar at 0-0 and whip over the accurate cross for Jamaal Lascelles’ injury-time equaliser.
The lad is looking for a new contract so give him the opportunity in an emergency to earn it. Who is to blame for this awful mess? Simple, everybody!
Ashley, absolutely without question.
He is the overall boss with a record of disaster and an indifference which beggars belief.
Nothing changes until he gets the heck out of town.
Bruce of course. How could he not be? He picks the players, decides the tactics, promotes negativity, drives muddled publicity, excuses everything. The buck, he has said, stops with him.
They are the two big offenders in the sore eyes of Geordies but we cannot overlook the players.
Yes, several have been forced to play out of position like Almiron and Gayle, which is not the way to get the best out of them.
United’s tactical approach in the past may not have been to the liking either. Square pegs in round holes.
However it is all too convenient for players to hide behind the failings of the ringleaders.
They must accept a share of the blame.
They are supposed to be better than all this. Well how about proving it on the field, whoever is manager?
Be men. Play for the badge footballers are only too willing to kiss as an empty gesture of passion.
All right, be self- saving even. Protect your own future as well as that of the club.
Sorry, there is no hiding place for anyone any more. We are past being nice. Well, I am.
The day of reckoning is coming, the day when all will face their accusers as the men and women of the jury.