Relationships strained when the heating is turned on

Feel that? There’s a chill in the air. So bang on the heating (if you can) and let’s talk about relationships, and how they heat up when the subject of temperature arises. Apparently, half of the UK’s couples fight over the indoor temperature in the winter. This is according to that most amusing of authorities, some survey commissioned by a company looking for mentions in the media. Come on down, Wolverhampton-based heating and cooling company Andrews Sykes, who gave us the excuse for puns about “heated rows”.

They’re also correct. Boy oh boy are they correct.

Messing with the heating reportedly undermines millions of relationships because of course it bloody well does. Two people might agree on many things, from detailed financial plans to the best kind of Pop Tarts (strawberry), but the boiling resentment over the slightest variation in the ambient temperature can burn out a relationship.

In my house, we treasure the heating. Nine years in rural Perthshire, first with coal-fired heating and then with terrifyingly-expensive heating oil, taught us the value of pressing a button to be cosy. However, the definition of “cosy” varies.

For example, that same study suggests the “perfect” average temperature is 21 degrees C.

I would argue for even lower because (a) it’s cheaper, (b) it’s better for the environment and (c) I like ridiculous woolly socks.

My wife, however, would prefer the temperature of our house to be similar to the inside of a volcano near the Equator, and never stops messing with the thermostat in an attempt to fry us all.

She has just seen this and wishes to comment: “I’m right. I know what’s best, OK?”

Yes, dear. Let’s agree to disagree.

Let’s also agree that everyone deserves comfort in the winter. The pressure group Energy Action Scotland reports that 613,000 Scottish households – that’s almost 25% – are in fuel poverty, meaning they spend more than 10% of their income on heating their home. More than half are older people.

That puts our arguments into perspective. So here’s an idea. Let’s check in on a relative or neighbour this Christmas, and show some warmth in the right way.

Messing with the heating reportedly undermines millions of relationships.