My clear-out managed to clear me out – emotionally

Before you are tempted to embark on a “quick sort-out”, allow me to present the maths involved in this task, as researched by me following a recent venture into a cupboard at Penman Towers. Minutes set aside for task – 45. Hours spent fulfilling task – 8ish (so far). This can be broken down as follows:

15 minutes – shaking your head at the amount of stuff that can be stuffed into one item of storage furniture;

30 minutes – trying to interest anyone else in the house in joining you for a clear-out. “Come on, it’ll be fun;”

Two hours – seething at the unfairness of having to do everything yourself, when most of the stuff doesn’t belong to you. Like the gold tees, free gifts from

old Doctor Who magazines and billions of left-over stumps of used scented candles (well OK, those last things may have been mine, but still .... ) start making piles of chuck, keep, stuff belonging to other people, misc;

1.45 hours – going through packets of old photos and getting a bit misty-eyed;

15 minutes – having restorative cuppa and comfort biscuits after emotional turmoil caused by old photos;

30 minutes – looking through old photo frames in order to indulge the nostalgia on a permanent basis;

15 minutes – taking photos of old photos on phone to share with the people featured;

30 minutes – finding bits of receipts, tickets etc from long-ago holidays (no, not a clue why these were kept) setting me off down memory lane again;

15 minutes – wee browse on internet of possible return to holiday destination;

30 minutes – trying to persuade everyone else to go through their piles for keeping/chucking purposes;

15 minutes – playing with outdoor boules set that last saw the light of day in 2004;

1 hour – stuffing everything back into cupboard then going to bed early with a headache, cursing all those people who swear you’ll feel far better after a good clear-out.

My maths isn’t great, but I think you’ll agree, it’s rather time-consuming. I’m now considering giving hoarding a try.

“Going through packets of old photos and getting a bit misty-eyed