Keep calm amid the hype and heed medical advice

Fiona finds that her family is getting through a lot more soap than usual and has suggestions on what to do with those leftover slivers

Iknow we have been told to keep calm and carry on. Yet somehow that word is always in the background. Switch on the TV or radio and someone will mention it. It might be a scientist forecasting doom and gloom. Or a politician popping up to dish out the latest health advice. And yes, prime minister, if you are reading this. We are washing our hands. Here at Armstrong MacGregor Towers, we are wash, wash, washing… We are not only washing. We are veritably scrubbing.

So much so, that the monster bar of soap I fished out of the cupboard a fortnight ago is now a shadow of itself. The thing is a mere sliver. Note to self: buy more soap. If there is any left, that is.

Of course, I realise that the chief and I will not be the only ones walking round with immaculate mitts. Take the MacNaughties, for example.

Whose paws I have also taken to cleaning after a walk. Because we are in this together.

Man, woman and dog. And it is not just the hygiene side. For now there is the travel to think about. The MacGregor has an upcoming photographic trip to Africa. So, does he go? Or does he stay?

Not that this coronavirus consumes our lives, you understand. Not like the real panickers. Among them the lady seen wearing surgical gloves as she gets on the train. Or the woman at our local supermarket who piles her trolley sky high with tinned and dried stuff – and then proceeds to wipe the shelves of sanitising gel.

I do not resent the dried milk powder. Or the baked beans. Good luck to her with the packets of pasta and the sachets of rice. But a gel glut is just plain greedy. Do you not agree?

Of course, panic buying may well happen here.

But not just yet. For the chief and I are still eating our way through the last chaos cupboard.

The one that was started when someone told us the sky would fall in after Brexit. It didn’t, of course. And, fingers crossed, by the time you read this, the heavens won’t have descended either.

Yes, let us hope that all will be well. In the meantime, if you are finding yourself with a surfeit of soap slivers, please do not waste them.

For these sad-looking remnants can be put to good use. Dried soap can scent drawers.

If you are a seamstress, it might serve

I do not resent the dried milk powder. Or the baked beans. Good luck to her with the packets of pasta and the sachets of rice

as a fabric marker. They say it does the same job as chalk. And the beauty is, the mark washes out. Also a shard of soap can be grated into bath water – rather like a home-made bath bomb.

Indeed, one friend tells me she puts her left-overs in a pair of old tights and uses it as a soap-filled sponge in the shower. Whatever you plan to do with yours, stay cool. Follow the advice – and remember to keep washing those hands…

Picture: Shutterstock. Amid the coronavirus outbreak, the best health advice for people is to wash your hands thoroughly.