What happened was most unfortunate. I had never intended to travel on that ill-fated train and was horrified when I heard what had happened

T“Robert, is that you?” Ann croaked, holding the lamp in front of her as she peered into the gloom. She sat upright, the bedcovers pulled around her shoulders. “Good evening Ann, forgive the intrusion.” He approached the bed and sat down at the end. “How are you?”

Ann glared at him, taking in the unshaven face and gaunt body in the dim light. It was most definitely her husband; he had a rugged look, but still the haughty sneer.

“Fine.” She pulled her knees up to her chest. “But what on earth are you doing here in the middle of the night?”

He was staring at her and then looked all around the room. “I see nothing has changed apart from your apparel. Instead of frivolous lilac, you now wear black, even in bed. Is that a new nightgown?”

Ann looked down at her gown, flustered. She pulled the collar up higher. “No, it is not. Robert, tell me, where you have been?”

She looked up at him, her eyes round. “We have been so worried. We have been grieving, mourning a husband and father who was lost in the Tay.”

He shook his head. “Ah, what a tragedy, so many lost. Up to 50 they think?”

“Or more, the bodies are still being washed ashore.” She tried to move her legs down the bed but his body blocked them.

Subterfuge

hursday January 8 1880

She must remain calm, considerate, attentive. She looked at him again and attempted a smile.

“The children look well.” He smiled as he shifted his weight further towards her.

“When did you see them?” she snapped.

“I saw them last night in their beds and today on the green.”

“So you have been watching us. Why did you not make yourself known?

“Why are you resorting to subterfuge, visiting in the middle of the night?”

Robert shrugged and continued to stare at Ann, as if taking in every feature anew.

“What happened to you, Robert?” Her voice was almost a wail.

He tilted his head back and looked up at the ceiling. “Before I tell you, I must ask you something important.”

“Yes, dear husband, ask.”

Contrite and humble, that is what she must be. But she must remain in control.

He turned back to her, his dull grey eyes looking into hers. “I sent a letter. I do not suppose it was delivered?

“I know the mailbags on the train must have been in the river so they would be sodden and . . .”

“A letter? What letter?”

He sat up straight. “Nothing important, Ann. It was simply some financial matters I had to attend to. But it is not a problem if it is at the bottom of the Tay.”

Her heart was thumping against her ribs, but she attempted another smile.

“No, Robert. No letters have been delivered here since the accident.”

She reached out for his hand and looked up at his stern face framed by his bristly beard.

“What happened? Did you get off the train at Leuchars? I heard there was a gentleman who did. But why did you not come home?”

“Why indeed.” He pulled away his hand, stood up and began to pace up and down, by the side of the bed. He stroked his beard then sat down on the chair next to her bed.

Good, less threatening, thought Ann. She could run to the door if necessary.

Unhappy

“As you know, Ann, our marriage has been a sham, an unhappy union with only two happy consequences. Our children.

“I have been thinking for some time that I would venture far afield to start a new life and Australia was often in my mind.

“Tasmania is where I have contacts through the whale oil business.”

Ann began folding and unfolding the hem of her bed sheet with her fingers, nimble as the jute spinner she had been.

“My intention was to travel there and begin a new life,” he said.

“A new life without your family?” Ann attempted to sound calm though she wanted to shout and scream.

“Well, of course I would have sent for you and the children later.”

Ann nodded, her icy blue eyes narrowing at this blatant lie.

“What happened, however, was most unfortunate. I had never intended to travel on that ill-fated train and was horrified when I heard what had happened.

“I took the train from Ladybank after visiting Aunt Euphemia and thence to Edinburgh where I began the long journey to Liverpool, where I was meant to board the ship to Australia, to prepare a home and establish my work before sending for my family.” “Why did you not tell me?”

“I wanted it to remain my little secret, to have everything ready for you over there then send for you.”

Liar, liar, liar! She continued twisting the hem of the sheet with increasing speed.

“But that would have meant weeks with no word from you, Robert. Even if the train had not crashed, I would have believed you dead, the children too.” “Do not question me!” he snapped, his voice loud. “Hush, Robert, you will disturb the children,” said Ann, scolding herself for inflaming Robert’s temper. Though his excuses made no sense, she must go along with his lies.

“So what happened, Robert? Why are you not on your way to Australia at this moment?”

Worried

“During my journey south, I was taken hostage by some brigands and kept captive for three days until I eventually gave them all the money I had hidden in my portmanteau.

“Then, since I had nothing left, I had to wait there till I was able to secure funds for my return journey.”

Ann was aware her mouth was wide open. How could he lie so? She swallowed.

“What a terrible time you have had, Robert. We have been so worried that you were at the bottom of the Tay.

“You should have communicated with us, any word at all would have helped alleviate our pain.”

She must overplay the grieving widow.

“I am sorry for the children’s sake. They must have missed their Papa.

“I missed them too, but I look forward to taking them to Australia soon.”

“That will not be possible, Robert.”

“Why ever not? I am their father, you have no rights to them.”

More on Monday.