She lifted the sand to her face and breathed in, a few grains falling from her fingers

They approached the south-eastern cliffs where Surtsey had collected samples the other day. Heaving grey slabs of land rooted in the sea. The cliffs contained tons of basaltic glass, formed when the magma from the original eruption cooled instantly, from 1200 degrees to zero as it hit the water. Steam explosions launched clouds and debris miles into the atmosphere. That the planet could so easily take on new forms, that’s why she studied geology.

On the one hand you looked at periods of time stretching for aeons; on the other, things could be created or destroyed in a moment.

Louise turned from the front of the boat and beamed at Surtsey and Donna. She looked so much younger, the years fallen from her face.

Surtsey slowed the engine and angled the boat to skim round the south cliffs where cormorants and terns were sunning themselves.

She saw puffins nestling in crevices, and this year the first gannets had arrived from the Bass Rock colony downriver.

They turned up the west coast, the vents visible from this side, two natural amphitheatres, black bowls of rock, one bigger than the other like a protective older sister.

Engrossed

They reached the cove in the shadow of the peaks where Tom was found. Surtsey rubbed her eyes.

Louise was engrossed in the view, leaning forward and peering at the landscape, eyes wide, soaking it in.

Surtsey shot a glance at Donna. She wanted her to understand the power of this place, the effect it could have on you.

That was the reason she and Tom had sneaked out here in the first place. It wasn’t about the sex, though they had plenty of that. It was about inspiration, feeling insignificant in the face of it yet also part of something bigger.

Surtsey never articulated this to Tom or anyone else. Right now she felt it again. It sounded hippyish, too much like her mum’s Gaia earth mother routine. But it was true, she felt in touch with the universe here like nowhere else.

They were round the cove now and Surtsey saw the jetty. Louise called back. “Can we land?” Surtsey looked at Donna.

“We’re not allowed, right?” Donna said. “Come on,” Louise said.

“I don’t know,” Surtsey said.

Her mum looked at her, the tip of her tongue jammed between her teeth. “Do I need to play the dying mum card?”

“Louise,” Donna said, shocked.

“Well, I am dying, aren’t I?”

“Don’t,” Surtsey said.

“Don’t die? I wish I had the choice.” She turned to Surtsey. Her shoulders were straighter than they’d been in months. “I want to land.”

Surtsey thought about Tom, the police, the messages on her phone. She looked around.

“If you’re sure,” she said.

Louise smiled then turned towards the island. Donna frowned.

Surtsey gunned the engine and poked the boat towards the jetty. She lined up alongside, cut the engine then threw the towrope over the post and pulled the boat in.

Donna got off first to help Louise out. She and Surtsey each held one of Louise’s hands and lifted her on to the jetty. Surtsey stepped out after, Donna giving her a hand.

Louise took a few hesitant steps along the planks, the girls hovering at either side.

“I can walk, for Christ’s sake,” she said, shuffling forwards.

Breathed in

She held a post and stepped onto the black sand. She crouched in slow motion, using the post to help her. Surtsey watched.

Her mum moved like someone twice her age. Louise touched the sand, scooped a handful and straightened up. She lifted the sand to her face and breathed in, a few grains falling from her fingers. “I’ve missed this place,” she said.

Donna stood behind, ready to catch her if she stumbled. Surtsey wondered about Donna’s relationship with Louise.

Surtsey had looked after her as long as she could at home until it was too much. She loved that closeness, even in adversity. But she didn’t believe that whatever doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.

Whatever doesn’t kill you could still make you as weak as a newborn, it could destroy you in other ways, negate all the good in your life, leave you with nothing.

“I was first here 24 years ago,” Louise said. “It was only a year old. You should have seen it back then. So full of energy, elemental.”

She was talking like the island was an old lover. Surtsey had a flash of lying with Tom on the eastern lava flow, behind the research hut, the sky violet at sunset, a lemon moon emerging over the vents.

“

If there is anything apart from my family that makes me want to get back on my feet, it’s being Liz again.

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Louise touched the sand to her mouth and kissed it. Grains stuck to her dry lips.

“It was settling down,” she said. “Maybe it still is. Maybe there will be more eruptions, more earthquakes. That’s why I love this place.”

She looked around. The low sunshine was a warm bath of light, long shadows from the vents turning the rocks purple.

It felt like the land was breathing, a heartbeat under the surface.

She brushed the sand from her fingers.

“It always surprises you. This place can do anything.”

Beautiful

“You have a beautiful home.”

Surtsey turned from pouring the wine. “Thanks.” She took the glasses over to the kitchen table where Donna was fidgeting with a bangle on her wrist.

They touched glasses. Surtsey took a couple of gulps as Donna had a sip.

“I don’t actually drink very much,” she said. “You don’t know what you’re missing.”

“It tastes nice,” Donna said, placing the glass on a coaster. “But I don’t like to get drunk.”

Surtsey snorted and took another drink. “Christ, that’s the best thing about it.”

They’d dropped Louise back at the hospice, exhausted but smiling.

Maybe it hadn’t been physically good for her, using up her reserves of energy, but Surtsey was sure it had helped her mental state, seeing her mum’s face on the Inch made that clear.

Once they got her settled at the hospice, Donna and Surtsey left, then shared an awkward silence on the prom.

Surtsey didn’t want to be alone. Iona was working, Brendan was gone and she didn’t know where Halima was.

So she asked Donna back to the house, partly to say thanks for helping with Mum, partly for company.

And partly because she felt that she owed her something.

The fact they hadn’t really known each other at school seemed a missed opportunity now.

She was easy to talk to, a good listener, and she was the only person in Surtsey’s life at the moment who didn’t know about her relationship with Tom.

If she could keep a small pocket of her life insulated from that, all the better.

More tomorrow.