The Courier & Advertiser (Perth and Perthshire Edition)
‘Giving bride away’ should be abandoned
Ex-Brechin minister claims fewer fathers carry out role and ceremonies must evolve
The tradition of a bride’s father “giving her away” during a wedding ceremony should be abandoned, according to a prominent minister.
Rev Scott Rennie – the first openly gay Church of Scotland minister – said the world is “increasingly ... less patriarchal” and ceremonies must evolve.
Writing in The Herald before today’s Scottish Episcopal Church General Synod, he cited the Church’s recent Theological Forum’s finding that “it is simply not the case that a single account of ‘marriage’ has been unchanged and constant throughout Christian history”.
He said: “Few fathers will any longer walk their daughters down the aisle to ‘give them away’ as if they were merely a piece of property or the occasion were a business transaction as in ancient times.
“They would hope for more for their daughters than that.
“They may place their hand in the hand of another, as a beloved.
“Moreover, these days it may not be dad but someone else who has had a formative place in a child’s life who hands them to the new love of their life.”
The former Brechin minister added: “Increasingly, in a much less patriarchal world, I encourage couples, who nearly always live together in any case, to walk down the aisle together as they come to make their marriage covenant.
“The symbolism is important. The couple are coming to marry one another, in the sight of God, and with the congregation bearing witness.
“All our churches are being asked to do is open their eyes of faith, and bear witness to the love that binds people together, whether they happen to be of a different or the same gender.”
Rev Dr George Whyte, Principal Clerk to the General Assembly of the Church of Scotland, said: “Who she walks down the aisle with at her wedding is the bride’s personal choice.
“Most still choose their dad if that is possible, but brides have walked with their groom, their mother, their bridesmaid and occasionally on their own. At no point is the father asked to hand over the bride, and in the service itself the couple make equal promises to each other as adults.”
The Church of England said: “Centuries ago daughters were thought of as their father’s property and giving her away at her marriage ceremony was a moment when ownership of her was transferred to the groom.
“Nowadays, it’s simply a wedding tradition and the bride can make decisions about if and how it happens.”
Dundee-based Rev David Robertson of the Free Church said: “The question of the father ‘giving the bride away’ is an irrelevant one to the question of what marriage actually is.”