Just give all these exhausting activity holidays a rest

What has happened to holidays? When did they become endurance tests? Why does every break away from the daily grind have to involve having adventures, improving ourselves or learning a new skill? It’s frankly exhausting. I did my share of roughing it and having adventures abroad when I was in my teens and 20s, but now I keep hearing about people of a certain age doing it all over again – presumably because they have the time and opportunity after working hard and maybe children are now off the books.

“We’re going up a mountain for a yoga retreat”. Why? Even more baffling: “We’re taking the kids out of school and all going on a gap year together. In a boat/camper van. We’ll home-school them while we’re travelling of course and they’ll learn more than they ever will in a classroom”. Yes, before the divorce.

The exception is of course if you are going on a weekend city break, where the following rules apply:

Make a list of approximately 385 things you have to do over the weekend;

Wake early, traipse around trying to do at least eight of them between cafe stops;

Get several blisters;

Sleep for 12 hours; Traipse around slowly (due to blisters); Decide to prioritise between galleries/museums/ sites of historical interest;

Prioritise further and spend the last day “soaking up the culture” in a bar, with your feet up.

Then there’s the holiday-shaming, as in: “We’re going to a nice hotel in the sunshine where we will spend time either by the pool or on a beach, reading books, before sampling the local food and drink.”

“But what will you do? Is there diving/surfing/swimming with sharks? Are you learning the language?

Is it an eco-location? Will you have to swim there to reduce your carbon footprint, then live on juiced vegetables while submitting to daily colonic irrigation?” “Er no, we’ll mainly be sunbathing.”

“Will you be learning to build a yurt though? Ooh, will you be staying in a yurt?”

Give me a break.

Why does every break away from the daily grind have to involve having adventures...?