Jolly Ollie debut goal gives England lift-off
England 5
Ward-prowse 14, Calvert-lewin 21, 53, Sterling 31, Watkins 83
San Marino 0
This is not really football, or not as we have come to expect it at the sharp edge of the modern game’s finely-conditioned technical supremacy, but like it or not, these were the car salesmen and office workers that Gareth Southgate’s team have to beat for a place at the 2022 World Cup finals.
San Marino, the worst team in the world, should by rights be playing in empty stadiums, but for the rest of us the new reality is wearing very thin when the contest is as poor as this one. This was the start of the truncated journey to Qatar 2022 and while the Germany team joined Norway the previous night in protesting the treatment of migrant workers in the Gulf state, England’s journey there was not accompanied by any political message. It was just another forgettable demolition of a very poor team that has never won a competitive game in its history.
Hard to know quite what to take from the game as England’s countdown to the delayed Euro 2020 begins, other than to say that Aston Villa’s Ollie Watkins scored on his international debut, little more than six years on from a loan spell from Exeter City at Weston-super-mare AFC. Indeed, Weston-super-mare AFC might well have beaten San Marino themselves and it might have been a more open game than this 90-minute siege of the away side’s goal that a lonely Nick Pope witnessed from the edge of his area.
Harry Kane got the rest that Southgate had enforced and in his place Dominic Calvert-lewin scored two to take his senior England goal tally to four in six caps. Jude Bellingham, a second-half substitute, became England’s youngest player in a World Cup qualifier at 17 years and nine months. Raheem Sterling began the game as captain, Conor
Coady ended it with the armband and the main obstacle to England reaching double figures, as their possession merited, was their own erratic finishing as well as the performance of San Marino goalkeeper Elia Benedettini.
There must be a point to all of it but that lies a long way from a game like this, in the politics of Uefa and which federation votes for which presidential candidate. It is from that which the sovereignty granted San Marino flows, not in their team which remains reliably unwatchable and damaging to the international game if it is to be promoted and preserved as part of the elite.
San Marino only conceded five in the end but given the number of chances they really should have shipped a whole lot more. “If we were being ultracritical we should have scored more,” Southgate said, “but we also have to say their goalkeeper had a fantastic game.”
Southgate selected a 4-3-3 formation although even he acknowledged there was not much that can be divined apart from establishing what he likes to call the “behaviours and habits to be a top team”. He means doing the necessary pressing to overrun a side like this.
England missed a lot of chances before the break and others were well-saved by the enthusiastic Benedettini, a goalkeeper at Cesena in Italy’s third tier. It seems like stating the obvious to say that he must get a lot of practice but he did make some fine saves.
There were two in the first half, from first Ben Chilwell and then Jesse Lingard and another after the break from a James Ward-prowse free-kick. Against San Marino, that urgency to take chances is absent. There will be another one along soon. Lingard was a source of energy in his first cap in 21 months. Calvert-lewin, selected as centreforward, scored twice having missed a couple and Sterling got one before his half-time departure.
Calvert-lewin got his first from a cross from Reece James with the sort of powerful jump and header that San Marino’s defence are not equipped to deal with. Sterling scored the third, powering down the left and cutting the ball back onto his right foot for a deflected shot at the near post.
Before then Ward-prowse scored his first England goal in this, his fifth cap, within 14 minutes, and really, what better opportunity could there be? Again, for Ward-prowse, the cross came from Chilwell on the left where he largely did what he pleased.
Sterling, Mason Mount, John Stones and James all departed at half-time. Southgate resisted any temptation to send on Kane before the end and instead the final two goals came from Calvert-lewin and then his replacement Watkins. Lingard made the first and Phil Foden, a second-half substitute, made the second for Watkins who finished well from the edge of the area. There should have been many more but it was simpler for England to ease off as San Marino reached exhaustion and dropped ever deeper.
By the end five goals felt like a good outcome for Benedettini. It is hard to say what the rest of his team made of it. This is 143 competitive games now for San Marino of which they have failed to win a single one. They are not even permitted to swap shirts these days to get a souvenir of the occasion.
Against Albania on Sunday and then Poland three days later, England can consider their 2022 qualifying campaign as starting in earnest.
Southgate is convinced this is a different kind of England team, capable of breaking down opponents with a deeper pool of talent to cope with injuries, and now he is about to find out if that is the case. San Marino (4-2-3-1) Benedettini 8; Michael Battistini 4, Brolli 4, Rossi 4, Grandoni 4 (Ceccaroli 55); Lunadei 2 (Giardi 79), Golinucci 2 (Manuel Battistini 71); Hirsch 2 (Mularoni 55), Berardi 2 (D’addario 79), Palazzi 2; Nanni 2. Subs Benedettini (g), Stimac (g), Zonzini, Nanni, Conti, Fabbri, Zafferani.