Murray could struggle to slum it on fairways
AActing as dogsbody and bodyguard for a golf pro might pose a mental challenge
s a Briton who can play tennis rather well, Andy Murray has always been a refreshing change, so it should be no surprise to find him eyeing a career in golf so different to those of his colleagues.
Ivan Lendl and Yevgeny Kafelnikov are just two grand slam winners who thought they could hack it on the professional fairways when they zipped up their rackets. And they actually did play on those perfectly manicured layouts in true hacker style when they dared to tee it up in elite golf competition.
Of the 15 invitations Kafelnikov received for the European Tour and its feeder league, the Challenge Tour, he made precisely no cuts. As did Lendl. Arrogance truly is blind to the water hazard.
As we know, Murray is not an arrogant man and that is why he is peering down the food chain when it comes to his tennis afterlife in those pearly-gated country clubs.
“I really like golf and being a caddie on tour would be exciting,” he told the Gentleman’s Journal. “To be up close and personal with top golfers, and to learn about another sport like that.
“There’s probably also some crossover between tennis and golf on the mental side and things, and helping a golfer with that might be interesting.” It certainly might.
In fact, it would be fascinating to see a knight of the realm carrying someone else’s clubs and being screamed at on the fourth fairway for having the wrong flavour protein bar in the bag.
How “up close and personal” does he fancy?
Probably nose to nose if he thinks that, as a 15-handicapper who shot 101 at Wentworth recently, he can help out on the “mental side” of hitting a three-iron 250 yards to that 18th green guarded by a lake. A forehand smash might just be the start of it.
Yet there is more to it than merely being the punchbag carrying that lunch bag.
On hearing about Murray’s impending application, the Tour Caddies, a group of some of the shrewdest operators out there, tweeted that it could be the ideal occupation for the 33-year-old, so long as he likes “a, dodgy Airbnbs; b, low job security; and c, shouting at people to turn off their mobile phones”.
Of course, the first two would not be a problem as Murray has the finances to travel in the same class of cabins and stay in the same hotels (although for his employer’s ego that could be an issue in itself ). But acting as a dogsbody to the pro and as a bodyguard for the pro, could pose their own psychological challenges for a multi-millionaire.
The lack of respect would surely get to him – and that does not necessarily come from the players. On the PGA Tour, caddies are not generally allowed in the clubhouse, are certainly not permitted in the locker rooms and, on occasion, have disgracefully not been provided with adequate shelter from storms.
The caddies refer to themselves as “rats” and the self-definition is only partly in jest.
There are no contracts, no pay-offs, no sick pay. At the Masters they are instructed to wear those uncomfortable white jumpsuits and at regular events don garish bibs that are essentially advertising placards, with no cut of the bounty. The rewards? Those working for the top guys earn substantial sums, but the average looper struggles from week to week. And on the female tours it is worse.
And how would caddying at the Olympics work for Murray, a two-time gold medallist?
Unlike coxes in the rowing races, caddies are not considered eligible for medals but, just like coxes, they are required to undergo drugs testing if asked.
In fairness, there will be other “competitors” in Tokyo being treated the same – the horses in the equestrian events for example.
“But at least they’ll get a good wash down and a polo mint,” one caddie remarked.
Murray would be appalled, but then, as a character who has regularly spoken up for women’s rights, maybe he could emerge as the shop steward for this downtrodden section of humanity. The caddies could do with a champion of their cause.