Beauty bible

Celia Walden on super-serums

WHENEVER EXPERTS GET on to ‘step four’ of their skincare ‘regimen’, I have to stop them. Not only is the word ‘regimen’ a uniquely joy-sapping Americanism that can only ever be spoken in a Californian whine, but step three is as far as I’ll go with daily skincare.

I don’t want to look like human potpourri any more than anyone else, but once you start getting into fourth and fifth steps it means forfeiting something that’s important to me – whether that’s time with my husband or child, time with a book, or simply time existing in the now and not some vaguely desperate and unrealistic hope of what the future could be, if only I were to put the hours in. I care about my skin, but I will never care enough for step four.

I also refuse to buy into the ‘layering’ marketing myth used in both the bedding and beauty worlds: the mattress toppers and mattress-topper protectors (and their dermatological equivalents) that have us living Princess and the Peastyle existences, all in the vain hope that step four, five or six will be the game changer. If a beauty product is efficient it should work alone, save you time and slow down time – since halting it may be a little too much to ask.

Step one of any three-step regime (followed by an SPF moisturiser and an eye cream) is of course the superserum. The best can do everything from protecting against pollutants and free radicals to repairing and reconstructing collagen, brightening skin tone and restoring elasticity, to providing a primer-like base for make-up – making step four completely redundant.