So-hot, So-smug and frankly, rather So-so

The country sibling of Soho House is certainly a place to be seen, but it’s too self-conscious to be truly relaxing

In the event of a nuclear holocaust, it is quite possible that only two life forms will survive: cockroaches and Soho House. One of them has an innate resistance to harmful outside forces and will breed quickly, effortlessly proliferating its species across the Earth. The other one will be OK because it’s a cockroach.

Will we ever tire of Soho House? Since the original club was founded by Nick Jones in 1995, above his modest French restaurant in Soho, the private members’ media hang-out of choice has expanded to dizzying proportions. There are now 23 around the world including offshoots in Mumbai, Los Angeles and Istanbul. There are seven in London alone and more than 71,000 members globally.

That’s one-and-a-half times the population of Margate.

In return for a pricey annual fee, members are given a nice black card that gives them access to a building decorated with a reassuring familiarity of aesthetic (sage-green walls, brass fittings, a discreet use of velvet and distressed mirrors). There’s also a menu that varies slightly according to geographical region, but which generally includes items such as a “macrobiotic bowl with turmeric cream” and “tuna poke”. Occasionally there’s a gym, hotel rooms and a rooftop pool too.

In Soho House, it’s highly likely you’ll find yourselves rubbing shoulders with a fairly large quotient of people who work in the media and when I say “people who work in the media” I mean “people who come to Soho House to talk loudly about how they work in the media”.

I am no exception to this rule: I, too, am a Soho House member and, as a freelancer, I enjoy being able to work in comfortable surroundings with solicitous service and reliable Wi-Fi. Otherwise, I’d just be wearing pyjamas in my flat all day. But even though I like Soho House, I can also appreciate its myriad absurdities. It can occasionally feel as though Nick Jones Great Tew, Chipping Norton, OX7 4JS, Oxfordshire

(01608 691000; sohofarmhouse.com)