Half-baked

We have become used to seeing so-called “distressed” jeans, even if many sartorial traditionalists still cannot quite understand the attraction of paying through the nose for clothing that has been deliberately torn and ripped. But if people are prepared to hand over hundreds of pounds for apparel that would once have been thrown away, you can only admire the marketing strategists who thought it up. Now they have another wheeze: muddy jeans. Many gardeners will doubtless be familiar with these; but the designer version cost £330 and the mud has been deliberately caked on and baked in. They are intended to give the impression that the wearer leads a rugged outdoor existence, when they have clearly taken leave of their senses. Just don’t put them in the washing machine by mistake.