Dogged rubber

SIR – I have become concerned by recent action taken against politicians accused of touching ladies’ legs.

I have regularly rubbed myself against the legs of both ladies and gentlemen, many of whom have expressed delight and indeed have rubbed my back and tickled my belly in return.

I give notice that I have no intention of changing my ways and trust my colleagues in Downing Street will remain steadfast in their habits. George the Cat

c/o John Pritchard Ingatestone, Essex