Police advice: we can help you stay with your abuser

A POLICE force has been criticised after a social media post appeared to suggest that domestic abuse victims should stay with their partners.

Essex Police posted a case study on Facebook about “Sheila”, a 65-year-old woman in an abusive relationship.

“She knew that the abuse in her relationship was wrong, but also knew that she wouldn’t leave,” it said.

“With help and support from specialist organisations and agencies, Sheila and her husband stayed together, but safely.”

The post is part of the 55+ Safety Net campaign, which aims to help older victims of domestic abuse.

After it came in for criticism, Essex Police apologised for the “clumsy language” of the post. One Facebook user wrote: “First time I’ve heard people being helped to stay in an abusive relationship.” Another said: “Such a load of rubbish, if it is abusive there is only one answer, get out now.”

An Essex Police spokesman said: “We have used clumsy language in a Facebook post that has clearly caused offence and we are sorry for that.

‘We used clumsy language in a post that has caused offence and we are sorry for that, but the stories are real’

“However, the stories featured in the campaign are real stories. We heard from victims who wanted help to leave relationships and we heard from victims who would never have called police but have been able to have counselling, family therapy and other interventions that made them feel safe.

“Our message in this campaign isn’t ‘stay in any relationship no matter how abusive’. It’s ‘if something is happening in your relationship even if you’ve been with someone for decades there is help you can get’.”

The campaign was launched with the Southend, Essex and Thurrock Domestic Abuse Board.

Dick Madden, the board’s chairman, said: “The campaign was developed directly with domestic abuse specialists, domestic abuse refuges, partners and most importantly, survivors of abuse.

“The message is clear – domestic abuse is never acceptable.”

He said the campaign included seven scenarios based on real-life experiences to encourage victims in different circumstances to seek support. He added they had “thought very carefully” about including Sheila’s story.

“Not all domestic abuse cases are the same, and not all victims will want to leave or consider reporting to the police,” he said.