It’s fine to be a ‘good enough’ mother
It is reassuring to hear the Duchess of Cambridge breaking the
omertà of new motherhood by admitting that there’s too much pressure on exhausted, hormonal women to be super-happy.
When you’re barely sleeping, you’ve just whelped a crybaby and even having a shower is a challenge, even bog-standard happiness can seem as remote as Kilimanjaro or getting dressed and going to the corner shop for milk.
I remember with my longedfor second daughter, I felt terribly detached and horribly guilty for not being more conspicuously buoyant.
One day, while wandering aimlessly, I bumped into an acquaintance in a local gift shop. She had just given birth to her third child, a continuously howling boy, and we exchanged the standard pleasantries before she whispered, sotto voce: “He’s not a very nice person, you know.”
There was a long pause and then we both burst into uncontrollable (hysterical) laughter, making the shelves of ceramic knickknacks tremble. I understood exactly what she meant. Needless to say, her son has grown up to be a very nice person, and my daughter is fabulous company. Sometimes, being a good enough mother is quite good enough.