WHY SETTLE FOR AVERAGE SEX?

Given that millennials invented Tinder and Deliveroo, you’d think we’d have managed to work out how to have decent sex by now.

Apparently not. Research from the ONS says that 49 per cent of those born between the early Eighties and late Nineties “lack sexual enjoyment”.

Perhaps it’s our living arrangements. Unable to buy, we’ve moved back in with Mum and Dad, creating a moderately resentful family commune that doesn’t do your sex life any favours. No one wants a night of passion set to the soundtrack of Dad’s sleep apnoea, and you haven’t known true shame until you’ve been made breakfast by your one-nightstand’s mum.

Almost as bad as sex under your parents’ roof is sex in a house share, with thin walls and lock-free doors. A friend was once interrupted mid-coitus by her beau’s housemate opening the door to say: “I have to get up at 6am so you need to finish faster.” There’s also the porn issue. We millennials have had access to it since we were teens. The first time my friends and I saw hardcore porn, we were 12, and in the IT room. A study by Middlesex University found that 94 per cent of children have seen porn by 14.

It’s no surprise, then, that the charm of falling into bed with someone, and seeing their naked body, feels a bit flat if you’ve been able to watch orgies on demand.

That said, I can’t help wondering if the real issue isn’t that we’re having worse sex, but that we’re less easily satisfied. “It was good,” I hear my friends say, “but not amazing.”

We’re known as “Generation Whine”, who want everything on our own terms. Perhaps we’ve extended that attitude to our sex lives – expecting “good” not just to mean OK, but mutually gratifying, with orgasms all round. If that’s the case, then for once I’m proud of my generation: why should we settle for average?