Students need sympathy, but must also learn self-sufficiency

Readers will know I have little truck with young people catastrophising normal, if uncomfortable, emotions: stress, anxiety, the sick Sunday-night-feeling that is common the world over. Tough love is still love.

But I completely understand why students would want the university authorities to contact their parents in the event of serious mental health difficulties. And I agree.

When a 14,000-strong cohort was questioned, 66 per cent said they would want their family to be told if they were experiencing significant issues. A further 15 per cent felt that should apply to even minor mental health conditions. I’m not sure what that “minor” means – weepiness over self-inflicted woes, carelessly missed essay deadlines, a surfeit of partying – but in principle, as a parent, I would want to be informed.

After enduring the turbulent teenage years, the joy of watching your fledglings fly the nest is always tempered by the anguish of wondering whether they are thriving rather than just surviving. Truthfully, 18-year-olds are big babies. I’m astonished I wasn’t dragged lifeless from a ditch after so many appalling errors of judgment when I went to uni.

Then there were the ridiculous (in retrospect) existential wobbles over course work, relationships and the rest. Not pleasant, but not fatal either.

They made me who I am, for better or ill; we are, after all, the sum of our experiences. A life free of adversity leads to individuals free of character.

It’s a good thing that young people – all people – are able to talk about their feelings and express their emotions. Of course, mental illness needs medical treatment. But for those who are simply struggling with student life, a shoulder to cry on may do more harm than good.

Counselling has its place; but make it mandatory and at 9am. Include compulsory exercise. Young people who need help should receive it, but not at the expense of instilling them with a sense of personal responsibility.