How Silver Line is helping victims of a secret crime
Dame Esther Rantzen’s helpline for older people can face a difficult choice, she tells Rosa Silverman
Phyllis’s daughter cannot control her temper. Although Phyllis is in her 70s, this hasn’t stopped her thirtysomething child slapping her and throwing her out into the garden. After it happened, Phyllis rang The Silver Line – and their call handlers transferred her to A&E.
Her story of abuse is just one of many the confidential helpline for older people hears on a regular basis. Another woman, Beverley, called to say her daughter had helped herself to all the money in her account. “It was about £2,000 and it’s all gone,” she said. “She took it in four or five payments.”
A third caller, Margaret, told the helpline her husband’s aggressive behaviour was growing worse, while Arthur, a fourth, said he was worried he may have been tricked into signing his house over to his son.
Dame Esther Rantzen, founder of The Silver Line, says the scale of the physical, financial and other types of abuse directed at the elderly is difficult to quantify, “because we’re talking about secret crime”. But judging by the nature of the calls to the hotline, which she set up six years ago to bring companionship to the 1.2million older people in Britain believed to be struggling with severe loneliness and chronic isolation – and which The Telegraph is supporting in its Christmas Charity Appeal – it isn’t a rare occurrence.
“If you look at the neglect aspect of it, it’s so widespread,” she says. “If you’d told me when we first started we would receive 10,000 calls a week, I wouldn’t have believed you. It’s a huge number, and a reflection of what has been called an epidemic of loneliness.”
The stories of abuse don’t always involve family. Caroline rang to say she was being abused in her care home. Staff had taken money from her purse and physically assaulted her, she reported.
Geraldine said she was forced to sit in a chair in her care home, soiled, for nine hours while work was carried out in her room. The Silver Line escalated this particular case to the Care Quality Commission (CQC), which regulates social care services. Short of contacting the relevant authorities, what else can the charity’s dedicated call handlers do to help those who ring them to discuss abuse?
Sometimes you just need to ask someone: are you happy? Are things going all right?
“You start off by listening, because by listening you actually empower someone; you give them confidence,” says Dame Esther. “We can advocate, we can contact people – social services, adult social care, the CQC. But we can’t go further than the caller wants us to.”
And sometimes callers are reluctant to escalate matters out of fear of jeopardising a relationship, be it with a family member or care home worker. “It’s a very difficult choice,” says Dame Esther. But staff can always offer advice. She tells the story of Mary, who rang to say her daughter-in-law was regularly taking money from her purse. “We can give practical advice, like ‘You might put a little less money in your purse and see if that works’, and so on. But it is very difficult because you don’t want to put the older person at risk. There are cases in which somebody’s partner is beginning to suffer from dementia, and sometimes one symptom is violence. People don’t want to report it sometimes because they fear they’ll be split up. But personal safety is important.”
She has her own suggestions for how any of us might reach out to those we suspect of being victims of abuse. Unannounced visits in which you “just happen to be passing, with a cupcake or a geranium” are one idea. Regular phone calls to older people who are isolated are also a good way to help “people get used to talking, because people can get out of practice,” she says. “And sometimes you need to ask: how are you feeling today? Are you happy? Are things going all right? Don’t be shocked by anything. But reassure people: things can change.”
Names have been changed. The Silver Line is one of three charities supported by this year’s Telegraph Christmas Charity Appeal. To make a donation, visit telegraph.co.uk/charity, complete the coupon right, or call 0151 284 1927