Hang on – don’t the Tories hate a far-left regime?

It doesn’t sound reassuring, does it? The Government has designated Huawei, the Chinese telecoms firm, a “high-risk vendor” – then invited it to help build Britain’s 5G network.

Perhaps any risks to national security can, as the Government insists, be “mitigated”. Yet after so many stern warnings, especially from America, the public could hardly be blamed for feeling uneasy.

The way some critics have portrayed it, it’s as if the local pool has hired crocodiles as lifeguards.

“Naturally, we at the leisure centre appreciate the concerns raised by some members of the public. We would like to reassure them that our decision offers many advantages. Our employees are willing to work without a salary, providing a significant saving; they’re all exceptionally strong swimmers and they’ve assured us they will be alert to signs of anyone struggling in the water.”

“Aren’t crocodiles a tiny bit dangerous, though?”

“We do of course recognise the potential vulnerabilities involved but we’re satisfied we have the capabilities necessary to mitigate them.” “How?”

“We’ve filled the pool with sharks. That should keep them in line.”

Yesterday in the Commons, Dominic Raab confirmed the decision.

“Risk,” said the Foreign Secretary, “cannot be eliminated in telecoms.”

Tory backbenchers received this admission and indeed the rest of Mr Raab’s statement in silence. Which was striking in itself. Since Boris Johnson won his landslide, it’s rare for his MPS to greet any announcement with anything short of ecstatic acclaim.

Still, if Tory MPS weren’t cheering, at least they weren’t actively jeering. And when the complaints came, their tone was sober rather than splenetic.

Penny Mordaunt, former defence secretary, said the decision was “regrettable”. Sir Iain Duncan Smith said he was “deeply disappointed”.

Richard Drax (Con, S Dorset) said he was “baffled”. David Davis, the former Brexit secretary, went the furthest, calling for Huawei to be banned from UK networks altogether.

Criticism from the SNP, however, was several doses stronger. “Let us be in no doubt: 5G infrastructure from China is not safe!” fumed John Nicholson (Ochil & S Perthshire). “Under Chinese law, every Chinese company is mandated to give whatever help it is asked to give to Chinese intelligence services, and in secret!”

Carol Monaghan (Glasgow NW) snapped only “naivety or arrogance” could explain the Government’s decision. Stewart Malcolm Mcdonald (Glasgow S) snorted that Huawei was not merely some “Chinese answer to John Lewis. This is a Faustian pact with the Chinese Communist Party!”

Labour’s response, though, was muted. Jeremy Corbyn wasn’t present, which was a pity. It would have been fun to hear him thundering away about the importance of national security, and the Government’s failure to grasp the threat posed by a far-left regime.