Ban sports banter? An eye-roll will do the trick

Isee that the attempt to crush and eventually exterminate that threatened species, the British male (Blokeus vulgaris), continues apace. The latest “problematic” masculine behaviour to come under attack is talking about sport in the office. Yes, really.

Ann Francke, chief executive of something calling itself the Chartered Management Institute, told Radio 4’s Today programme that companies should discourage their employees from talking about sport because it could make women feel uncomfortable.

“A lot of women, in particular, don’t follow those sports and they don’t like either being forced to talk about them or not being included in the conversation,” she said. “It’s a gateway to more laddish behaviour. It’s very easy for it to escalate from the VAR [video assistant refereeing] talk and chat to slapping each other on the back and talking about their conquests at the weekend.”

Hands up, any female readers who have ever been “forced” by a male colleague to talk about the Chelsea game or Stokes’s latest incredible century. I thought not. If necessary, it’s perfectly possible to deal with blokes banging on about football with an exaggerated eye-roll or a swift counter-attack about Bake Off. That aside, what are we to make of Ms Francke’s shockingly sexist assumption that women dislike discussing sport?

I loved the response of Vicki Young, the BBC’S chief political correspondent. “Ridiculous,” she tweeted. “Colleague Jessica and I spent several minutes moaning about Fulham this morning. We eventually let Daniel join in, too.”

What on earth are chaps supposed to discuss if sport is banned? For some, it is practically their sole conduit of communication with their fellow man. This difference between us doesn’t make me “uncomfortable”, it makes me happy.

The mind boggles to think what gender-neutral topics the deluded Ms Francke might consider suitable for office discussion. Pets? Weather?

Next time cricket talk in the office is failing to bowl the maidens over, can I recommend starting a discussion about childbirth? Nothing like a spot of perineal trauma to clear a room.