Should you really let your pet sleep in your bed?
As a survey says that most owners happily sacrifice shuteye for their pets, begs to differ
When it comes to our two beloved cocker spaniels, Ellroy and his son Larkin, aged five months, I am a soft touch. Treats at the table, perching uncomfortably on the sofa so they can starfish, more toys than Hamleys… in fact, I’m hopeless. Until it comes to bedtime. At lights-out, I become Canine von Trapp, sending them straight to their sleeping crates without passing Go – or the bedroom.
I assumed this was normal. Puppy manuals suggest that dogs are happier sleeping crated and, in both cases, it took just three nights for any whining to stop. We sing them a little song and give them a biscuit each, and not a creature stirs till morning.
But now, a survey from Silentnight has put me straight. Apparently, eight out of 10 pet owners compromise their own sleep for their pet’s comfort, a quarter let the dog “steal the duvet”, and 12 per cent even “kick their partner out of bed” to give pets more room.
Ours are allowed to jump up each morning to say hello (which, in the puppy’s case, means frenziedly sprinting over my head), but the idea of two twitchy spaniels scratching and thumping around all night is too stressful to contemplate.
A straw poll of friends, however, suggests I am uncommonly strict. “Ruby, our Westie, sleeps on our bed every night,” confesses Marianne. “She does wake us most nights. We are ridiculously soft and just trudge downstairs to let her out.”
Marianne and her husband are now “used to getting up at 4am when Her Ladyship needs a wee. Or sometimes she just wants to bark at a tree.”
Increasingly, it’s now considered acceptable to co-sleep with animals – much as we did in the distant past around the cave fire. “It’s very important for some pet parents to sleep close to their animals,” says Dr Jessica May, of Firstvet. “It may even have a positive effect on quality of sleep for both, and is no longer considered to lead to behavioural issues.”
In fact, according to the Centre for Sleep Medicine in Arizona, 41 per cent said co-sleeping pets were “unobtrusive or even beneficial to sleep”. There are issues, though – small dogs can fall off and when they age, may have distressingly unreliable bladders. It’s also a consistency issue, says dog behaviourist Adem Fehmi (dog-ease.co.uk), who points out that if dogs are accustomed to bed-sleeping, this can pose a problem if you take them somewhere it’s not permitted.
“So much depends on the breed, age and circumstances,” he says. “Although bed-sleeping might settle the dog, this could make it even more anxious when it can’t physically be close to its owner, such as in a kennel.” If your dog is bed-sleeping and showing anxious behaviour, he adds, don’t disrupt its routine – consult a dog behaviourist.
“My personal preference is for them to sleep in their own bed to avoid any potential incidents or behavioural issues being heightened,” he says. “A dog who is set up at the beginning to feel confident sleeping in their own bed will not feel stress should their routine change as a result of old age or injury – they will be able to continue to sleep in the way they have always done. We need to think long term for our dogs’ wellbeing.”
It is ultimately a case of personal preference, though, as it can offer mutual comfort. Laura, who co-sleeps with Betsy, her Chihuahua, says: “Because she is so small, I can still stretch out in bed. Half way through the night, she comes under the duvet and sleeps in the crook of my knee.” Laura adds: “I love feeling her softness and tiny heart beat.”
This is not quite so appealing to owners of larger or multiple pets. “Penny isn’t even allowed upstairs,” says Jo, who has a Labrador. “I just don’t feel it’s hygienic. Also, she’s obsessed with underwear and socks – and if I let her in our bedroom, I’d just be feeding that habit.”
“We have two rottweilers,” says writer Ellen Manning. “I’ve lost count of the nights I’ve had terrible sleep because there’s not enough room. We’ve got a super king-size bed, but even that isn’t enough for two full-size humans and two large dogs.”
On a hygiene note, she adds: “Once you’ve had dogs for a few years, you come to accept that most things are going to get messy – but equally, most things are washable and cleanable.
“And ultimately, when one of them passes away, which will break my heart, I know I’ll be glad I have memories of hearing them softly snore as they dream, curled up with their favourite humans.”
Flic Everett
‘Once you’ve had dogs for a few years, you accept that things are going to get messy’