It is war out there – but walkers and runners can strike a peace
New rules of engagement are needed as Britain’s paths become clogged up, says
Out on a run last week, having artfully dodged and shimmied my way around several parks near my house, I found myself navigating a troublingly narrow avenue of trees. It was less than a metre wide, and all runners and walkers were making micro assessments relating to time and space in an effort not to get too close.
All seemed reasonable, until a rogue runner appeared: a heavily sweating gentleman, stomping down the middle of the pathway, coughing as he went. He looked like the living incarnation of the virus itself.
Runners and walkers alike threw themselves into bushes as he sparked a tidal wave of pure panic. What was he thinking?
As a runner I felt ashamed.
It seems I am not alone in my condemnation. Runners, by nature a gentle breed, are experiencing a brief window as public enemy number two (second only to the virus itself). The parks and woodlands of Britain have become a battleground between two warring tribes.
For the first time in history there are public calls to ban running, or restrict it to certain hours.
It seems that runners are frightening walkers with their laissez-faire attitude to personal space. Walkers, in turn, are unnerving runners with their brazen passive-aggressive hostility and middle pathway hogging antics. Make no mistake, this is war.
Pre-corona, runners and walkers lived in peace. They would even exchange nods; bipedal kindred spirits separated only by pace. Now, social media is aflame with accusations.
“Ignorant runners – sweating and spitting!”
“Aggressive walkers – hogging the woods and parks with their superspready children!”
As both a walker and a keen runner, I see both sides, so am keener than most to work out a way we can coexist. Here goes…
First, we all need to accept that, for the moment, and in fact for many moments to come, life is different.
Although we are all in this experience together, we have never been further apart. We have to self-isolate, we have to socially distance. Of course it’s awkward; it seems a very British trait that we seem embarrassed about trying to save each other’s lives, but unfortunately when I see you and you see me, we both see potential carriers.
I don’t know many people who, having forgone football/concerts/ childcare/work, are willing to catch Covid-19 from a jogger too impatient to
Paul Tonkinson
If you’re a new runner you are outwardly perceived as a sweaty virus portal
wait their turn on the towpath, so let’s not take it personally.
Walkers: you can help by not walking two or three abreast. Stay left. Or at least pick a side and stick to it. Just gesture with your hand the way you’re going and we’ll adapt. And, when it’s particularly narrow, consider single file. That’s all you have to do.
Runners. This is on us. We want to run, we need to run and, at the moment, it appears to be in the “things that are allowed now but won’t be in a couple of weeks” category. Let’s be grateful and try not to muck it up.
I understand that this business has hijacked our plans. Many were training for spring marathons, and suddenly there’s nothing. We are, like most people, struggling with a total collapse of meaning. But we can enjoy it while we can by sticking to routes that won’t be busy. Let’s not be greedy: minimise contact, go around the houses, and go early. If we do see walkers and there’s no room, do a detour or just stop and stretch. This is not a race, it’s a marathon, and the aim is to feel the benefits without compromising our immune system.
More people than ever are running. When I wrote my book late last year, running was nibbling away at the mainstream. Now it seems half the nation have cottoned on to its utter utility, the simple but profoundly therapeutic effect of putting one foot ahead of the other at faster-thanwalking pace. If nothing else it offers a brief respite from spiking anxiety.
It’s lovely to see so many new runners, but be aware if you’re a new runner it’s likely that you will sweat more. You are outwardly perceived as a sweaty virus portal so be aware of your surroundings. Awareness is key. Don’t be afraid to stop and savour the suddenly sweeter air.
We will get through this, runners, and when we do there will be more of us. We will nod again at the walkers and the walkers will nod back.
All this madness will be over, we will sigh with relief and unite once again against the real problem: those bloody cyclists!