Labour sacking buries the story far better than all the Tory excuses

‘For pity’s sake, officer. I can’t believe you’ve pulled me over for speeding during a global pandemic’

You’d think the Government would be getting better at making excuses. After all, the Dominic Cummings saga gave them plenty of practice. But this Robert Jenrick saga suggests that, if anything, they’re getting worse at it.

Take the peculiar non sequitur offered by Nicola Richards (Con, West Bromwich East) during a debate in the Commons on Wednesday. Indignantly, she claimed it was wrong for Labour to criticise the actions of the Housing Secretary “during a global pandemic”.

It would be interesting to see how well that excuse would work for a member of the public. (“For pity’s sake, officer. I can’t believe you’ve pulled me over for speeding during a global pandemic.”)

Memorable though Ms Richards’s efforts were, however, they were comprehensively eclipsed yesterday by Nadhim Zahawi. Appearing on the Today programme, the junior business minister offered a bumper selection of excuses for Mr Jenrick.

Just to recap: in January, Mr Jenrick overruled the Government’s planning inspectorate, and gave the go-ahead to Richard Desmond, the billionaire businessman, to build a £1billion property development in East London. Mr Jenrick made this decision the day before the introduction of a council community levy that would have cost Mr Desmond £40 million. A fortnight later, the Tory party got a donation from Mr Desmond of £12,000.

On Today, Mr Zahawi did his best to fight his colleague’s corner. Earnestly he insisted that Mr Jenrick’s actions were motivated purely by altruism (“The intention was to get more housing built for people who really need it”). He also stressed that the Prime Minister “considers the matter closed” (as if the leader of Mr Jenrick’s own party were some kind of impartial, independent arbiter).

Justin Webb, presenting, pointed out that in Nov 2019 Mr Desmond attended a fundraising dinner for the Tory party, where he spoke to Mr Jenrick about his plans. An ordinary member of the public in, for example, Doncaster, said Mr Webb, could never expect that kind of access to a government minister, could they?

Mr Zahawi, however, disagreed. “If people go to a fundraiser in their local area, in Doncaster, for the Conservative party,” he said, “they’ll be sitting next to MPS and other people in their local authority …”

Interesting advice. Apparently, tickets to attend the Tories’ Black & White fundraising ball last year started at £500 a head. “Premium” tickets, meanwhile, were priced at £1,500. Once the people of Doncaster have been alerted to these bargains, I’m sure they’ll go like hot cakes.

Still, there was some relief for the Government. Later in the day, Sir Keir Starmer sacked Rebecca Long-bailey – his former leadership rival – as shadow education secretary. The Labour leader said Ms Long-bailey had tweeted an article that “contained anti-semitic conspiracy theories”. Immediately Westminster switched its attention to this new controversy.

The Tories had been struggling to bury the Jenrick story. Unwittingly, Labour may have done it for them.