Why daytime TV is making me cry
➤ I was taught not to show emotions but nearly every day I hear of generous acts for my MND foundation
One of the strange side-effects of motor neurone disease is that it plays havoc with your emotions. Some people end up laughing uncontrollably, even at the most inappropriate of times. I have the opposite problem. I tend to well up at anything that involves the slightest tinge of emotion.
The other day I had tears in my eyes watching Supermarket Sweep because Kenny and Gabby Logan were on the show raising money for my foundation. Even a children’s cartoon can set me off if there is a scene where one character is caring for another.
A lot of modern men are unafraid to show their emotions. Unfortunately, I am not a modern man. I am not comfortable displaying vulnerability. I am from a farming family where you are taught to pitch in and never grumble.
As a rugby player, I was coached by Jim Telfer, who ruled with an iron fist in a titanium glove. I was called “a bawbag” or worse by my team-mates for most of my career. That is why I find it so hard when people are kind to me. I am still not used to it. I almost prefer it when people take the mick out of me.
Nearly every day I find out about a new act of generosity, whether it is someone running a marathon for the foundation or a neighbour offering to help out around the farm. At times, it can be overwhelming, particularly when it comes out of the blue.
So when Gregor Townsend popped by the farm the other day to drop off the Doddie Cup, I had to pretend I had a bit of dust in my eye.
Even if it has my name on it, that was such a wonderful and unexpected gesture. Scotland do not win trophies all that often. So for Gregor and the team to decide to let me hold on to it, particularly as I am known not to be the safest pair of hands, is a privilege. It is now pride of place on my Table of Fame alongside my Helen Rollason Sports Personality of the Year award and my 50th birthday cake.
If that was not enough, Jonny Gray also very kindly gave me his shirt from that Wales game. He has had a pretty good few weeks hasn’t he? Winning the Heineken Champions Cup then the English Premiership with Exeter and now the Doddie Cup, which I am sure he will agree is the most important trophy of the lot!
It is wonderful that I can have a connection with modern players, mainly through my foundation. One of my big concerns was that today’s players are getting cut off from the rugby family, being stuck in a corporate bubble where they have little interaction with ordinary punters or players from yesterday. Fortunately with Scotland, Gregor has made sure that is not the case and it has been a pleasure to get to know guys such as Jonny.
He is some player. He can carry the ball, an amazing defender, has a massive work rate, a true gentleman and very well behaved – basically he is the opposite of me. It is staggering how much rugby has moved on. I do not envy these boys one bit how hard they have to work and how little opportunity they get to celebrate their wins.
Overall, it has been a great little period to be a Scotland supporter.
Winning in Wales for the first time in 18 years and then last week our football team qualifying for their first major championship in 22 years. What is it they say about buses? I have to admit that I did not see the football team’s crowning glory. When Serbia scored in the 90th minute, I felt like the air was being sucked out of me. In true Scottish style we had come so far only to fall at the last hurdle when we were 10 lengths clear.
I thought, I cannot handle watching them lose in extra time or on penalties so I will go to bed. It was only when my good lady woke me in the morning with the news that I realised we had gone through.
As I am classified as vulnerable, I have had to shield for the entire pandemic so my connection with the outside world has been cut off. Watching sport on TV – even if it is not the same as being in the stadium – gives you a sense that you are connected with everyone else. You know that you are cheering and swearing at the same time as thousands of other people.
I really hope Scotland can continue their great form tomorrow against what I think is a fabulous French team.
But the biggest news in recent weeks has to be the breakthrough with the coronavirus vaccine. Hopefully this will herald the eventual return to normality in society. And that gives me so much hope around MND. Everyone said that finding a vaccine would take 10 years. It took 10 months. Now there is no reason why we cannot do the same with MND.