Supply of unpaid female labour is dwindling, City’s fathers seek way out

Pandemic caused reset on what a career looks like – some dads have not gone back to pre-covid ways

As the champagne flowed at a black tie event last week, the conversation drifted not towards promotions and big splurges but on the joys of swapping a big job at a big bank for a less high-profile role that means more time spent at home.

A senior banker with a second child on the way describes how little he misses his life in Canary Wharf. He is not the only City dad to quit. There is a growing cohort of relatively senior, highly paid men who no longer see powerful jobs in male-dominated industries as the holy grail.

City institutions which have long ignored the so-called invisible labour typically done by women – the unpaid, usually private activities which keep a family running – should pay attention.

Many demanding jobs have only worked out for young families because someone else held everything together at home. As parenting becomes more equal, these time-consuming roles aren’t looking very appealing at all.

An entrepreneur living in an affluent part of London says he used to be one of only two dads on the school run. Now, he says, it feels like almost half the parents at the school gates are men.

The author Katherine Faulkner summed up this change last month, when she noted a “huge brain drain from traditionally male-dominated, high-pressure, long-hours roles seen as prestigious a generation ago”.

Why? Well, partly, she explained on social network X, because these jobs were often made possible by the unpaid labour of women – and they are no longer up for it. It’s a shift that’s taking place across the country.

Faulkner made her point after social media users questioned why such a large number of Labour candidates in winnable seats appear to be so young. LBC presenter Ben Kentish asked a Labour insider for an explanation, and the answer was simple. “No one with a family wants to do the job any more.”

As the division of labour slowly becomes more equal, perceptions about what makes a good job are changing. Roles which look impressive on paper are likely to be snubbed by young dads in future if they come with brutal hours and miserly paternity leave rights.

The Families and Work Group, a coalition of charities, unions and think tanks, found in a recent poll that almost half of respondents think dads should have at least three months’ paternity leave. More than two-fifths said mothers and fathers should get the same leave and pay entitlement in a baby’s first year. The Fatherhood Institute is campaigning for all UK fathers to have at least six weeks paid paternity leave, with the UK’S statutory paternity offer the least generous in Europe and one of the worst in the developed world.

Joeli Brearley, founder of the charity Pregnant Then Screwed, said many dads are “desperate to spend more time with their children” but three in five took just two weeks paternity leave for their most recent child.

Perks which might have once gone overlooked, such as generous paternity leave packages and home working, are becoming increasingly important for job-hunting dads.

The pandemic caused a reset on what a decent career looks like. Some of those who enjoyed the extra time with their newborns or older children during lockdowns have never gone back to their pre-covid ways. One in nine stay-at-home parents was a dad in 2022, according to the Office for National Statistics (ONS), compared with one in 14 before Covid in 2019.

“Mothers are working more and fathers are increasing their childcare and housework,” Adrienne Burgess, joint head of the Fatherhood Institute, told The Guardian. Their analysis of ONS data also found the average daily number of minutes spent on unpaid childcare by working fathers who live with their children full-time increased by 18pc during the pandemic.

The changes go beyond the UK. A report from State of the World’s Fathers, involving 47 countries, found men did more care work during Covid than at any other time in recent history.

The shift in behaviour doesn’t mean that we’re anywhere near solving gender inequality when it comes to unpaid care work – the world is still at least 92 years away from achieving anything like that. But it does mean that we could be on the cusp of a talent exodus in certain sectors and in powerful, inflexible jobs.

Corporate giants which have long relied on their big name brands to recruit and retain senior talent will probably be the most hit. Well paid sectors, such as finance, will continue to be dominated by men but the prestige is fading as more dads look to increase their responsibilities at home.

Geraldine Gallacher, the chief executive of the Executive Coaching Consultancy, warns that City institutions forcing people to work long hours in the office every day could struggle to retain staff.

Deal advisers are realising that they can’t wine and dine clients five nights a week and also do the school run.

While older generations got their status from out-earning their peers, now the bragging is all about how much time is spent with the kids.

As the unpaid labour of women dwindles, City dads in all-consuming jobs want out.