THE DIARY

OUR story about having a picture of revolutionary Che Guevara reminded Barrie Crawford: “An elderly couple I used to visit were staunch royalists and had a large picture of the Queen and Prince Philip in their hall. Sadly, the husband passed away. Shortly after the funeral the lady was visited by someone from social work who, as she was leaving, noticed the picture and said to the widow, ‘My, your husband was a fine looking man’. Her reply would need to be censored.”

SHOULD Rangers fans gloat at the downfall of Celtic against French side PSG? As Tory MSP Murdo Fraser observed with tongue in cheek: “They’ve sold out of croissants in Larkhall.”

But Irish bookies Paddy Power thought Rangers fans shouldn’t get too carried away. As they put it: “Rangers fans taking the mickey out of Celtic – it’s like standing outside a nightclub you didn’t get into, laughing at someone doing a rubbish dance inside.”

HOWEVER St Mirren supporter Ian Smart couldn’t resist: “Celtic fans will now spend 10 years protesting that Paris St Germain couldn’t legally afford the team that beat them and demanding that the official record be rewritten.”

A WEST End reader passes on a comment from a friend who told her: “I spent my whole day off cleaning the flat. My husband walked in, didn’t notice, and asked if I’d had a relaxing day.

“Now I understand why the spouse is always the first person murder squad detectives suspect.”

“Why? Was I driving too close?” asks Donald Grant who was behind this car in Paisley.