The Herald - The Herald Magazine
Teddy Jamieson’s TV week ahead
THERE’S been a murder. I know, I know. What’s new? How many murders are there on telly on an average day? London Kills returns this weekend for a second series.
It’s possible you didn’t catch it first time around as it aired during the daytime schedule. But that might not be as much of a problem for many of us in the current circumstances.
What do you need to know? Well, like I said, there’s been a murder. There’s a body in a back garden in Camden and the suspects are the students who used to live in the house. It’s up to the murder team led by Hugo Speer, who plays DI David Bradford, to find out who is to blame.
Bradford/Speer, all stubble and brooding looks, has his own secrets. His wife has disappeared, and his teenage stepdaughter believes he’s murdered her mum. She’s playing up a bit, which in the circumstances, is maybe understandable. Oh, and he’s got another secret too; there’s another woman and a child. Frankly, it’s a wonder he gets any policing done.
Just as well he’s got backup then. Detective Sergeant Vivienne Cole, aka Sharon Small, her blonde hair in an up-do that is half Amy Winehouse, half motorcycle helmet, as well as Bailey Patrick and Tori Allen-Martin, playing a trainee detective constable still wincing from being stabbed in series one, are on hand to do the heavy lifting. Speer pops in for the odd catch-up. Delegation, I think you call it.
Created by Paul Marquess, the creator of the rather similar Channel 5 police procedural series Suspects, which starred Damien Molony and Fay Ripley, London Kills was originally commissioned by Acorn TV for America and then bought in by the BBC for a screening here. The first series aired last year and it’s the latest in a well-established afternoon telly paradigm now, post-Father Brown. In between all the country houses for sale and antique sales, murders are part and parcel of the daytime menu.
As drama, it must be said, London Kills is lean to the point of starvation. The characters are sketched in the faintest of pencil lines. There’s no banter in the police office, no real sense of an interior life for any of them. Mostly, each episode majors in a catalogue of “significant” looks shared between the four cops. To be fair, all four actors give
good significant look. In truth, London Kills feels a bit like a Poundland CSI. It essays an idea of policing where science always sorts everything out, where policemen and women never make a mistake, where suspects will cave and spill the beans at the slightest pressure.
Against this, it’s clear that the budget doesn’t quite match its American counterparts. And so, apart from the interstitial shots of the London cityscape at its glossiest, glassiest and steeliest (the Shard and the Gherkin are effectively supporting characters), soundtracked by the odd John Carpenter-style synthy throb, it mostly takes place on doorsteps or in interview rooms. And given that the whole investigation is wrapped up in less than 50 minutes it’s fair to say that these scenes don’t quite match the intensity of Line of Duty. (The “quite” in that last sentence is doing an awful lot of work, if I’m honest.)
And yet, and yet, it’s kind of moreish in a low-stakes kind of way. In episode two (Tuesday) a pub landlord has been bashed over the head by a baseball bat.
What follows is a whistle-stop tour through family dysfunction including a scene which sees Nicola (EastEnders) Stapleton and Leonora Ponting catfighting in the street. And around the margins the Speer/Bradford edges forward.
The one thing you can say London Kills has in common with Line of Duty is that it does like a twist. More than one. So, don’t think you know whodunnit after five minutes.
And that’s the appeal of these things. They’re puzzles, aren’t they? Like doing the crossword without having to actually use your brain.
Plus, watching it in the first days of the lockdown, there’s one more strange, thrilling incidental pleasure to it too. In the second episode, as Patrick and Small give us the latest lump of exposition, you can hear in the background the noise of alarms and passing traffic. It’s an instantly familiar soundtrack. And yet that’s already the world we’ve left behind. How sweet it now sounds.
Race Across the World, meanwhile, sees our four duos almost through their trek through South America and climbing into the Andes in Peru. Unfortunately, Paddington doesn’t make an appearance but there will be bears.And guinea pigs for tea.
London Kills starts on Monday on BBC One at 2.15pm and runs all week. Race Across the World continues tomorrow night on BBC Two at 8pm
What’s the story?
One Night In The Museum.
Is that the film starring Ben Stiller where the exhibits come to life?
That’s Night At The Museum. I’m talking about a cracking four-part BBC Scotland series following primary school children from around Scotland as they visit some of the UK’s greatest museums after hours. The world is their oyster with millions of years of history to explore.
With no grown-ups around to cramp their style, it is up to the youngsters to navigate a labyrinth of learning on their own. The idea is to spark their imaginations as they encounter strange and beautiful objects from the past, offering a light-hearted commentary along the way.
Who is the narrator?
The dulcet tones of Mark Bonnar.
Oooh. I like him. What museums do they visit?
The National Museum of Scotland, Edinburgh; Manchester’s Museum of Science and Industry; The National Maritime Museum, London; and The Royal Armouries in Leeds.
The opening episode will focus on the National Museum of Scotland. Death is a theme that looms large in a fascinating manner: the collection includes Egyptian coffins, mummified bodies, long-buried Vikings, a casket for an executed Queen and the skeletons of many extinct species.
When can I watch?
The series begins on BBC Scotland, Wednesday, 8pm.
SUSAN SWARBRICK