Champions to go green

THE increasingly woke Liverpool Football Club is reportedly going vegetarian. I can’t imagine it’s totally vegetarian or “vegan”, as implied in the tabloids, but it is at least partnerning up with meatsubstitute company Quorn “to help the Reds go green”.

It’s all part of the club’s support for “sustainability”. I can speak authoritatively, as I’m a fan of Quorn sausage rolls.

I’m not sure if a couple of these before a match would help the players but perhaps the fans, who are to be offered Quorn products, will like them.

I can’t speak for those at

Anfield but the meat pies at football grounds leave you feeling physically ill and psychologically disorientated.

In Scotland, I’ve eaten several hundred over the years and, with the exception of those at Kilmarnock and Dunfermline, if I remember (I’ll need to check my pie diary), every single one was disgusting.