Am I an addict?
IF YOU need a mind-altering substance to get through life, then you are probably an addict. You may ask yourself, “Why me?” The answer is simple; the chief activator for selfmedicating is self-centred fear. “I am not enough; I don’t measure up to my peers.” “I am too thin/too fat.” “I am a fraud about to be exposed.” And on and on...
These fears affect politicians, CEOs, models, actors, geniuses, teenagers, the elderly, homeless people and every type ad infinitum. Addiction does not discriminate.
The first step is to admit and accept that you have a problem and that you need help.
In the past, I dressed in £1,000 suits, had a chauffeur, a big house, a gorgeous wife; but I needed alcohol, cocaine and tranquilisers to function every day.
I was an egomaniac with an inferiority complex!
In this way of life, there are no happy endings. The addict needs more and more of his/her substance in order to maintain ‘control’ over a seemingly uncontrollable existence. As life goes on, the substances take precedence over family, work, morals, ethics, etc. The drug takes over your life and you lose the power to make choices.
You are truly powerless. It’s not a question of willpower, self-determination, or religion. It is a disease. Like diabetes or cancer, it needs to be treated. The good news is that millions are dealing with it one day at a time — we don’t want it, but we got it. And, we have found a way to put the disease into remission.
A programme of recovery coaching entails daily coaching and lifestyle changes for the many who do not want to go into an in-patient rehab and are looking for complete privacy. Working with the patient one-on-one daily, in addition to attending 12-Step meetings, allows someone who is newly sober to follow in the path of someone who as been there.
WHAT IS 12-STEP RECOVERY?
Millions of sufferers have found recovery through the 12 Steps. Founded in 1935, by Bill Wilson and D. Bob Smith, known as “Bill W” and “Dr Bob”, 12-Step recovery programmes are support groups with the basic premise that one addict can recover if they work with another other.
WHY A RECOVERY/SOBER COACH?
“Working with an outsider who is not emotionally invested in an addict’s case can be more helpful than turning to a friend or family member. High-risk situations are not always predictable, and having someone there 24/7 is helpful,” says William Zywiak, a research scientist with the Center for Alcohol and Addiction Studies at Brown University.
But it’s not for everyone, and should be complemented by other types of treatment, such as therapy sessions or support groups. “It’s a poor fit for clients with a dual diagnosis, like a mental health issue,” Zywiak says. “Coaches are experts on sobriety, not other conditions.”
This individual form of coaching consists of the sharing of life experience that can go much deeper than in a support group or at a treatment centre.
Private residential treatment centres can be expensive and require patients to leave their lives behind for a time. Some clients want to move, for a while, from their usual haunts, but what comes next? A programme of sober coaching can be more affordable.
My experience is that it takes a minimum of two weeks to absorb the information needed and to detoxify the body. But it takes a minimum of a month, to six months, to a year to truly evolve into sober routine. The aim is to get the addict self-dependent as soon as possible
Like diabetes or cancer, addiction needs to be treated’
Mervyn Fogel is an active AA speaker and interventionist, based in the USA. In 2017 he moved to Israel, where he started daily AA meetings on Tel Aviv beach. He returned to South Florida in 2020 to shepherd other men through their recovery journeys. His typical client is male, 25 to 70 years of age. +1 561.880.1360 ( five hours ahead of GMT); merfog1@aol.com.
If you think you may be an addict, in the first instance speak to your GP