Only on Planet Celeb...

GWYNETH Paltrow and Chris Martin ‘consciously uncoupling’ was cringe-making enough. But now actor Michael Sheen has revealed a comically right-on excuse for breaking up: Brexit. The Welsh star ended his four-year relationship with US THE Crown star Claire Foy’s latest film, The Girl In The Spider’s Web, has had a rough ride from critics. Maybe channelling Edmund Blackadder for the role wasn’t such a good idea? comedienne Sarah Silverman because he wanted to move back to Britain from LA to find out why so many people wanted out of the EU. She, in turn, decided to travel America talking to people about why they voted for Trump. Their pillow talk must have been riveting.

HERCULE POIROT is to lose his iconic Belgian accent in the BBC’s Agatha Christie drama at Christmas. John Malkovich is giving the world’s most famous detective the tones of an English gentleman to reflect Poirot’s 20 years of living in England. Do the producers not realise that for Poirot diehards this is sacrilege on a par with the Queen delivering her Christmas message in a comedy Scottish voice?

IN HER irritatingly titled new book Why French Women Feel Young At 50, sultry author Mylene Desclaux (dumped by her man for a 37-year-old) shares gems such as these: Never wear culottes. Change your first name if it’s dated. Don’t throw a 50th birthday party.

Mylene trills that sparrow-like French First Lady Brigitte Macron is a paragon of empowerment. Perhaps she could add another ‘rule’ with Madame Macron in mind: Women of 65 with bony knees should ditch their mini-skirts.